The Inner Workings and Deeper Meanings of Ed Sheeran's Subtract
The in-depth review of Ed Sheeran's Subtract that no one else will do.
Why do we care about the artists we do?
I don’t mean “why do we enjoy their art”, I mean why do we care about them? What about them draws us to check out their art in the first place? Why do we follow and keep up with artists to see what their newest piece of art is about? Why do we get invested in their appearances, their lives, their personality, anything that makes us want to tune in and learn about them?
On the opposite end, why do we care enough about artists to hate them? Why does their art offend us so much that we have to make it known to whoever will listen that we don’t like it? Why do we take every opportunity we can to relish in their failure? Why has it become a normal response to see an artist you already didn’t like turn out to be a huge piece of shit and for us to respond with, “Thank God, I have a good reason to hate this artist now”?
There’s a philosophical answer to this that someone else can probably explain, but for my little monkey brain my answer would be something along the lines of “our feelings on an artist is part of our identity”. If art resonates with you, that generally means a part of you connects with it, regardless if it’s as basic as “I wanna have fun and this is fun” or as complex as “it reminds me of my trauma and how I’ve processed it”. But there’s an asterisk to this; in order for that art to connect to that part of yourself, you have to let it. Ironically, caring about an artist one way or the other means you also put up barriers for the sake of keeping an image. Fans will deflect against their favorite artist doing something wrong because it would challenge the connection they previously made with them, and maybe recontextualize it to a point where that connection is lost. But that applies to hatred of an artist too, because if an artist does something that shows improvement or they do something that is undeniably good, some will find it hard to accept and try to downplay that improvement. So… a bias, essentially. We can be conscious of it, or we don’t notice it until it’s pointed out to us. Either way, it’s unavoidable and pretty tough to keep in check without any self-awareness or willingness to challenge it.
But it’s still good to be aware of it, right? In fact, I’ll go as far as to say that keeping your bias and refusing to budge on it is really unhealthy for your relationship with art. I honestly believe that it does a disservice to the art if you actively put up barriers to keep it from challenging you. Even if you reach an uncomfortable truth about yourself and why you react the way you do, that conversation is valuable to understanding not just your relationship with the artist, but yourself. Why does that artist bother you so much anyway? What about them makes you repellent to them and why do you have a hard time accepting that maybe they can make good art every once in a while? What about this artist resonates with you so deeply that you can’t fathom the idea that they’re not who they say they are? Are you too attached to the artist and need to give yourself some perspective, or are you in a healthy enough position to criticize them while still being a fan?
I realize this is an odd way to start an Ed Sheeran review but I bring it up because he occupies a very odd space in pop culture. He’s one of the most successful artists alive, arguably the biggest male pop star of our current era. So much so that at some point in time, he’s held accomplishments such as “most streamed song of all time” and “best-selling tour of all time”. Clearly, there’s an audience for his music, and that audience is huge. So naturally, his reputation in music nerd circles, especially online, is a wasteland of negativity and cynicism. You’d be hard-pressed to find an extremely-online RateYourMusic user who doesn’t think Ed is the definition of their favorite word, “mid”. Overplayed songs, mainstream appeal that leads to basic songwriting, he’s a straight cis white male who isn’t conventionally attractive so he’s an easy target to make fun of, the complete package of the soulless pop star who makes music to print money for the industry and nothing else. Music critics aren’t particularly kind to his albums either. If anything, they’re usually incredibly harsh and condescending toward him.
You’d think that would result in a similarly intense positive fanbase online, but there really isn’t. He doesn’t have active fandoms that tweet about his music all the time like BTS or Taylor Swift. You probably won’t find a lot of deep analysis of his music and its meaning on the same level of artists like Kendrick Lamar or, well, Taylor Swift. In fact, those fandoms seem to treat Ed Sheeran with the same ire and contempt as the nerdier circles, even those who are fans of people Ed has collaborated with. When Ed recently beat the lawsuit sent against him by one of the co-writers of “Let’s Get It On”, I saw a lot of people backtrack their approval over Ed’s win with “I’m not a fan of his music, but”. Usually, they were the same people hoping that he’d lose the lawsuit so he’d commit to his threat to retire. If Ed Sheeran has this massive audience of fans, the simple explanation is that they’re just… not online.
Which I have mixed feelings about. Because obviously the internet is not representative of the rest of the world, and just because some obnoxious people on Twitter want to make jokes, doesn’t mean I should feel insecure or upset over a group of people who universally don’t like him. On the other hand… It still sucks, doesn’t it? I started this by asking why we care about artists and their work and it applies here because I do care about Ed Sheeran. I do care about his music because I think it’s genuinely excellent and underappreciated by music nerds. It does bother me when people expel this vile hatred against him for the sin of having a song played on the radio a lot. They shield themselves from seeing how much smarter and more thoughtful Ed is as a songwriter and pop star. I don’t think someone who only makes shallow pop music would be able to write a song like “Bloodstream”. Hell, even those overplayed pop songs deserve more credit, because Ed revolutionized guitar playing through loop pedals and building beats from the ground up solely through self-percussion and guitar rhythms. That’s a gift that none of his copycats could ever hope to match. But you don’t notice these things unless you allow that artist to show themselves to you and let you see what they’re capable of. If you go in expecting nothing but shallow pop garbage that’s only made to rack up #1 hits… of course you’re gonna get that. It’s all you’ll ever see.
I’m going to be very transparent and borderline petty for a second. The only reason I decided to get into this album is because of something Youtube music critic Anthony Fantano (theneedledrop) said on his second channel. He tends to cover pop culture news every now and then to add his commentary on it, and in this instance, he talks about a comment Ed Sheeran made about critics and how he doesn’t see a need for them in the streaming age where you can judge for yourself. In it, Fantano mentions how Ed Sheeran is right that critics don’t tend to like Ed Sheeran’s music and don’t expect them to, adding on that you’re not going to get any real depth or insight from an Ed Sheeran album because all you’ll be met with is shallow poppy songwriting. The exact quote is as follows;
“As far as the art of criticism or the act of trying to dive deeper into an album’s inner workings or deeper meanings, there’s not really any point in doing that with an Ed Sheeran album. It’s very much a thankless act, it’s a fruitless endeavor.”
What makes this quote so unbelievably irritating and insulting to me is that it’s coming from a critic as renowned and respected as Fantano. This is defiantly untrue no matter what artist you apply this to. Hot take, but you can get into an album’s inner workings and deeper meanings from ANY artist, actually. No matter how many cooks are in the kitchen, an artist always puts a part of themselves into their art, and whether or not that involves depth or anything more than “be catchy”, it’s still something. But it’s especially galling saying that about Ed Sheeran, who if you listen to just ONE deepcut from, this whole theory falls apart. How the hell do you listen to Ed’s music and not pick up on themes of substance abuse, self-loathing and depression, grief, love, and family even once? Maybe it’s not the most complex thing in the world, but complexity is not a prerequisite to resonance. It’s ridiculous to imply that just because you don’t get billy woods-type political commentary or Sufjan Stevens-level existential dread, it means the art as a whole is shallow and worthless. If you can’t get anything out of their music, then why cover it? Why punch down on art that was never going to appeal to you in the first place? I understand needing a successful video to pay rent, but there is no shortage of mainstream releases that you clearly care more about and are more willing to give an honest chance that can take its place.
So I wasn’t shocked when he dropped the review for Ed’s newest album, Subtract, and it only proved my point. Despite giving Ed more credit than usual for moments that did resonate with him, the review was still full of backhanded compliments and dismissive hand-waving of songs that just didn’t click with him on the first listen. What’s most telling is that he talked about the album as if it’s about a failing relationship, and how they need to make it through the year in order for their love to survive. Which is… not what the album is about. At all. Not even close.
All you have to do is watch or read a single interview, look up the lyrics on Genius following the context provided, or watch any of the promo videos Ed uploads to Instagram discussing each song individually, or really a single Google search for “ed sheeran subtract meaning” and you’d realize that Fantano didn’t look into what the album was about before reviewing it. That says it all, doesn’t it? The guy who says you won’t get anything out of doing a deep dive on an Ed Sheeran album goes on to not look into an Ed Sheeran album and get the album’s concept, themes, and lyrical sentiments wrong for his millions of subscribers to watch. Can’t even make a witty comment out of that. It just makes me sad.
Ed Sheeran deserves a way better examination of his art than that. He doesn’t need it, he doesn’t even care what critics think, but considering more people are going to watch Fantano’s shitty review than any review that actually cares about Ed Sheeran and takes his music seriously, I wouldn’t feel at peace until I give Ed Sheeran the time few others online are willing to give him. I think I’m qualified for the job. I’m a big fan of all his albums, including polarizing ones like Divide, Equals, and No. 6 Collaborations. I actually know what the songs are about, who they’re about, and even a bit of his creative process. Hell, just to take the extra mile, I watched the documentary he did on this album on Disney+. I wouldn’t say it’s essential for getting the album, but it provides a ton of context into Ed Sheeran’s headspace and the events that fuel each song on the album.
In February 2022, Ed Sheeran was given a triple whammy of bad news almost simultaneously. Doctors discovered a tumor in his then-pregnant wife Cherry which later turned out to be a cancer, and they couldn’t do anything about it until the baby was born. Not too long afterward, Ed’s longtime collaborator and best friend Jamal Edwards suddenly passed away. As if that wasn’t enough, Ed Sheeran got a call learning that he was getting sued for copyright infringement on Marvin Gaye’s “Let’s Get It On” over one of his biggest hits, “Thinking Out Loud”. A baseless case that ended up being prolonged for such a long time that a verdict was reached mere hours before the release of Subtract. In all three cases, no matter how you feel about Ed Sheeran, this is shit nobody should have to go through. Your life partner possibly having their life cut short and not being able to do anything about it except wait, losing someone who meant the world to you and shaped you into the person you are today, and a lawsuit that if Ed loses would be terrible for not just him, but any artist who can lose millions of dollars over shared chords and flimsy evidence. Just dealing with one of those is bad enough, but all three at once?
Originally, Subtract was meant to consist of songs written throughout the course of Ed Sheeran’s career, packaged into a purely acoustic album after the previous albums defined his style as an artist. It’s actually really interesting to hear the way Ed Sheeran describes his previous albums in the documentary. Turns out the mathematical titles aren’t a gimmick, they’re all on purpose. Plus represents additional songs added to the EPs he was making during his come-up, Multiply was made to be bigger in scale and budget, Divide is divided into his two main styles (acoustic and R&B), and Equals is meant to represent everything Ed has made so far from acoustic, to pop, to R&B, to world music, and more. It actually explains a lot about how these albums were formatted, and why Subtract takes a step back from the big pop production and superstar persona to bring it back to his singer/songwriter roots.
But after the deluge of mental stress Ed went through during that month, he ended up deciding that none of those planned songs would accurately capture the state of mind he was in when recording it. Which was depressed, anxious, paranoid, and riddled with grief. All of these songs were made mostly on the fly, with Ed coming up with lyrics after The National’s Aaron Dessner sent him the initial drafts. Even with their quick turnaround time, I found a decent amount to say about every song on the album.
“Boat” is the first song written for the rebooted album, and it fits as the first song on the album. It’s about resilience and holding your ground, even against the ruthless waves. Yet, even in its promises to stay strong and make it through, you can hear traces of self-doubt crawling on its back. The most obvious one is in the chorus, where he says, “They say that all scars heal, but I know maybe I won’t”. Just because he’ll make it through, doesn’t mean he won’t be hurting from the trauma. Which even in the rollout for this album has been very true. During the Zane Lowe interview, there’s a point when talking about Jamal where Ed breaks for a moment and starts crying. He cries a lot in the documentary, but considering this interview was done months after the album was finished and the tumor in his wife was removed, it’s pretty obvious that the wounds are still fresh.
It makes sense that after supposedly promising to stay strong, the very next song is the very lowest and darkest point of the album. “Salt Water” has Ed Sheeran imagining himself jumping off a cliff and into the ocean, letting the frigid cold water overwhelm his body and cause him to “leave everything”... Yikes. Ed has made allusions to losing himself to depression before. Songs like “Bloodstream” come to mind where he completely falls to a mix of drugs and alcohol and watches himself spiral into a mindless haze. But this is the first time he’s outright referenced experiencing suicidal ideation. It doesn’t hold anything back either. It describes the exact location vividly, and the feeling of standing over a cliff where the only thought in your head is “jump”. At first, I did feel a bit iffy about ending the chorus with “It was just a dream”, but Ed does something clever in ending the bridge consisting this repeated phrase with, “Was it just a dream?”. Even if it’s only in his head, it’s kept vague whether or not he actually went to the cliff and thought about doing it. Maybe he did it in the dream but in real life? How much of the rain seeping through his shoes and harsh winds he felt was real?
“Life Goes On” touches upon an idea that Ed Sheeran talks about a lot on the documentary (I’m aware that I skipped a song, we’ll come back to it). After Jamal’s death, Ed had to go through a Nine Nights, a Carribean tradition of visiting the family home every night, reflecting and remembering the life of one who has passed on. On the ninth night, you have a big party to celebrate their life, and afterwards you can go home and move on. But… move on from what?. Their death? As if you’re supposed to stop feeling sad about them and continue with your life? Obviously, it’s part of life to move on from grieving at some point in your life, but it’s also in reality impossible to do. Just because it’s been a week, or a month, or even a year, that doesn’t mean you don’t still cry about it. “Life Goes On” isn’t sad, it’s angry. Angry that he has to keep going without Jamal in his life. There’s bitterness and desperation in his voice as he shouts things like, “I am so afraid, I need you now”. It’s one of the more harrowing songs on the album, and easily one of my favorites. While I was editing this, Ed Sheeran released a remix of this song featuring country star Luke Combs, and I’m honestly stunned I didn’t think of this sooner. “Life Goes On” musically is a very Luke Combs song, and with the subtle addition of country instrumentation, it turns out to be a really good remix, if not one I prefer over the original.
The following song, “Dusty”, might be my favorite song of the whole album. Mainly because it’s one of the few truly bright spots of the album. Rather than wallow in its misery like the rest of the album, Ed finds himself in a moment of solace when his daughter wakes him up to start the day with a Dusty Springfield record. It’s a common tradition for Ed to play records for his daughter, and seeing her smile as the song plays reminds him that even with everything going on, everything’s gonna turn out okay. It’s a brief moment for him though, as the night would eventually bring back the grief he’s been going through. In the Zane Lowe interview, Ed describes exact scenes of him crying himself to sleep and waking up to his daughter happily snapping him awake, ready to take on what the morning brings them. It’s not like the darkness has left, it just means the light is always there. Special props to the bridge of this song, which swells from the unassuming, calm instrumental to a more triumphant burst of emotion before settling back down. Whether it’s the dark thoughts coming back to remind Ed that things aren’t good right now or a moment of pure happiness that blasts through said darkness, it all comes back to where it started. With a simple record and a human connection.
Ed Sheeran makes an interesting observation regarding grief. The first time you experience real, heavy, personal grief, it signifies the end of your youth. It’s the first truly adult thing you have to deal with, and its consequences on your mental health can’t be controlled. However you end up processing someone’s death is up to you, but the pain will be there, and it’s going to be hard to deal with it for the rest of your life. What I like about this sentiment is how there’s no specific age where it’s supposed to happen. Ed has had friends whose youth died when they were still kids, but Ed himself didn’t lose his youth until he lost Jamal. You can kinda tell based on the way he’s approached death in the past. Songs like “Afire Love”, “Supermarket Flowers” and “Visiting Hours” have a very sweet and optimistic angle, remembering the great lives the subjects led and how they’ve impacted the people in their life. But on “End Of Youth”, none of that sweetness is there. All it can focus on is the overwhelming spiral of a life that deserved more time and has mentally destroyed Ed to the point of losing his innocence. It’d be pretty easy for this concept to come off as cheesy, but I think the song avoids that by acknowledging how just because something is normal and happens to everyone, it still sucks to go through. Because Ed was closer to Jamal than he presumably was with his grandparents or Michael Gudinski (the subject of “Visiting Hours”), the loss feels so much more personal and bleak. Especially since Jamal died at a much younger age than the previously mentioned people did. He had so much more to give to the world, and to take him away like this feels so unfair.
There’s a scene in the first part of The Sum of It All where Ed and Cherry go on a date at a local paint studio. They paint on two large canvases, spreading paint trails and splatters across the blank page and designate meaning to what this random assortment of colors and splatter mean. It’s a very lovely scene, but it’s also the first time Cherry’s cancer diagnosis is referenced in the documentary, and it clearly makes the otherwise romantic atmosphere significantly more tense. That scene really stuck with me, and I always think about it whenever I listen to another album highlight, “Colourblind”. A soft, gorgeous song about Ed’s relationship with Cherry that’s as sweet and loving as his past few songs, but with a bit more melancholy sprinkled in. Mainly in describing Ed’s dark, depressing mental state and the ways Cherry is able to bring him back into the light. In that painting scene, Ed remarks on how the messy, sporadic, mixed-up paintings represent where his mind is at right now, with Cherry even designating one of the paintings the title of “Sad Man”. I see a lot of that feeling in this song because even in its darkness, there’s still something beautiful about the art the two made together. Completely in sync, even when their headspaces are in different places.
“Curtains” is a rare moment on the album where the tempo picks up and Ed tries more of an indie rock groove rather than sticking to the pure romantic ballads. Despite its more upbeat nature, it’s still a really dark moment on the album where every attempt to reach out to him is met with rejection. The song itself is about opening up the curtains and being willing to finally face the world rather than stew in your rejection. The brilliance of this song, however, is that most of it is still really depressed and unable to keep up its own facade. He keeps his emotions close to his chest, only allowing a peek into what he’s really feeling while still making the effort to actually move on. It relates to the topic discussed in “Life Goes On”, where it feels like you can never truly stop grieving despite the world expecting you to go back to normal. This is the new normal. People ask about him, making sure he’s okay, giving small answers so that they can eventually back off and let him live that “normal” life. It’s worth noting that there was a good chunk of 2022, while on tour and starting up promo for Subtract, Ed got kind of lost in “business as usual” and not giving himself proper time to process. To the point where he’d break down after shows or rarely see his family for months on end. I feel like he channeled a lot of that frustration and needs to keep moving forward into this song.
I don’t have much to say about “Borderline”. It’s a song more generally about depression but doesn’t have as much background as some of the earlier songs do. I do really love its lyrics, which is one of the most bleak and harrowing of the entire album. Rather than trying to hold on to hope that he’ll make it through, this song sounds like he’s already given up and surrendered to this deep melancholy he finds himself in. Unfortunately, this song does kind of lose me in Ed’s performance, which spends too much time in his falsetto and makes this otherwise dark song feel a bit too lightweight for its subject matter. If I had to pick a song from the standard edition to name as the weakest song on the album, it’d be this one.
“Spark” is another moment of respite on the album. Although that’s not the same thing as being optimistic or hopeful. “Spark” is instead a moment of clarity for Ed and his relationship with grief. Ed has spent a good portion of this album resenting the idea of “moving on”, but on this song, he realizes that resentment might be holding him back. It’s caused problems with his marriage, it’s not been beneficial to his mental health, and it’s made him lose sight of what’s truly important in his life: his family. That said, it’s also not that simple. The most important lesson Ed learns on “Spark” is that moving on… isn’t necessary. There are some things that will be with you forever, especially when it comes to grief. For Ed, he will never move on from Jamal’s death. He doesn’t need to. It’s the biggest loss of his life, and there’s nothing that will ever make that okay. It just means he has to learn to pick his battles, find the moments that remind him of why he’s still here, and if wounds reopen again… let them. Sometimes we need that moment to keep grieving because everyone processes things differently. It’s that mixture of healing and hurting that makes this song so special to me. It’s the kind of song you can watch the stars to. Whatever state you’re in right now… it still hits the same.
“Vega” is the first song from Subtract to get a preview in the documentary, as it was written not long after Ed learned of his wife’s cancer diagnosis. It’s an intimate and sad moment of an otherwise feel-good first episode, especially when the song itself is so deeply sad. I consider it to be sort of a reverse version of “Boat”, where the optimism and hope feel suffocated under a thick cloud of dread. Every plea of “she’ll be fine” sounds less and less true every time he says it, which is especially gutting in the bridge when he practically shouts it. I find the use of Vega as a metaphor really potent. Coincidentally, it’s a star within the constellation of Lyra, and Lyra is the name of their first daughter. Cherry had to wait until she gave birth to their second daughter before they could deal with the tumor, which made the fear of something going wrong during the waiting period even more heart wrenching. Not just for her, but for their then-unborn daughter as well. So Ed’s relationship to Vega goes in so many different ways, including how it relates to his family, the brightness that they bring to his life, but also the burning sensation that comes with the fear of losing them.
“Sycamore” has some of the most brutal imagery of the album. A constant juxtaposition of a happy life at home and an anxious night in the waiting room. That hopefulness trying to pull through in “Vega” is slowly burning out like a match. The build-up in this song to its devastating ending is one of the most emotionally potent moments in Ed’s career. The way he begins the song with the image of his wife and daughter happily playing on the sycamore tree and ends with that tree completely abandoned and alone utterly guts me. For as many moments there are of peace and reassurance that everything will be okay throughout the album, none hit as hard as the more certain moments of doom, despair, and desperation. “Vega” tried to get out of it, but “Sycamore” is where Ed submits to it.
And yet… “No Strings” brings it all back. It doesn’t recover from the darkness, but it finds the strength to keep going anyway. If they make it into next year, they’re going to be okay. As cruel as time can be, it can also be a blessing. Because once you’ve gotten through the hard part, everything else doesn’t seem so bad. Having this be the only pure piano ballad of the album makes this feel especially powerful. As if all the noise has stopped and the only thing you can hear now is Ed’s love for his family. It reminds me a lot of another penultimate ending to an album, Marianas Trench’s “Forget Me Not” from Astoria. As the dust settles and all that matters is me and you, the message of always being there by your side as long as you can is truly romantic. I think it helps that for once, this song doesn’t feel desperate or trying to make peace with a terrible situation. It’s simply a promise.
I’ve mentioned before that the album used to consist of songs written throughout Ed’s career, but were ultimately scrapped to make way for the newly written songs made as a response to Ed’s grief. Well, there are two exceptions to this rule, and one of them is the closer, “The Hills of Aberfeldy”. This was always planned to end Subtract, and was written a whopping ten years ago along with fellow songwriter Foy Vance. This is one of the most different songs on the album, though more for its Scottish-tinged production consisting of bagpipes and mandolin alongside the usual guitar and strings. Lyrically, it’s ground that Ed has been through before. A love song about how their bond is so strong that it can survive even the coldest winter of a small town in Scotland. It’s a very sweet and intimate song on its own, but as an album closer I find it really potent. It’s not about the grief Ed Sheeran has been going through, it’s just something close to his heart. His love of his wife, the love he has for Aberfeldy itself, and the dedication to those he loves, even if they may stray from him for whatever reason. As a way to cap off an album where Ed was at his lowest point, and has to live with the fear and sadness instilled upon him by fate’s cruel hand… It shows that Ed still has some fight within him. He’ll make it through.
I should also note that the album has four additional bonus tracks, but I won’t go in-depth about them since they tread a lot of the same waters that other songs on the album do. That said, they are really good songs, and I would recommend you listen to them anyway! “Wildflower” is a really lovely tribute to his daughter, “Stoned” is just as dark as “Salt Water” and in some ways even more devastating, and “Toughest” is the best of them with the most explicit reference to things going on in Ed Sheeran’s life while making this album. Even down to referencing the lawsuit and how it’s affected his mental health. You could probably skip “Moving” though. It’s the weakest song across the whole album and is most disconnected from the album’s themes, instead being about a past relationship. It’s good and all, but far from his best and not essential.
Looking back I’d probably call this Ed Sheeran’s most consistent list of songs to date. It drags a bit at the end, but that doesn’t really matter to me because they’re among the best songs on the album. Not just that, but some of the best songs of Ed Sheeran’s entire career. I think this album is just shy of beating Multiply, but I can see it getting there with time. I look back at songs like “Boat”, “Salt Water”, “Life Goes On”, “Dusty”, “End of Youth”, “Colourblind”, “Spark” and “The Hills of Aberfeldy” and I’m just floored by their painful honesty and quiet brilliance. Aaron Dessner was a great fit for this album, and all of his arrangements give this album a unique identity that stands out over the rest of Ed’s discography. The acoustic sounds are so much more refined and beautiful. It allows Ed to stay in a more subdued, melancholic state while still giving him room to start expressing himself when the emotions are too much. Admittedly, I wish the album had more instances of an indie rock groove like “Curtains”, but I also understand that Subtract is more sparse and lowkey by design. It wouldn’t make sense to have more rock or pop moments like the other albums do.
That’s also why I’m not bothered by this album underperforming. Well, “underperforming” in the sense that streaming isn’t on board. Which, of course it’s not. Streaming is where a lot of young people get their music, and this album is not geared toward a younger audience. It’s a very adult album with heavy themes that people well into their lives have contemplated or have only now begun to really process. That’s not to say a streaming audience can’t latch on to these songs, but I highly doubt that a song like “Life Goes On” is going to be on a TikTok trend the same way that “Boy’s a liar Pt. 2” or “Kill Bill” are. Plus, all artists eventually go through a decline of some form, and Ed has been conscious of this ever since Collaborations No. 6. He never really wanted commercial success for this album anyway, it’s clear that in the documentary he basically does this promo cycle out of obligation. It always stood out to me that the documentarians actually interviewed Cherry individually, cuz it gave her the space to say she feels like he’s burying himself in his work and not letting himself truly process what he’s going through. Honestly, you can hear it in a lot of the music itself too. Especially with his begrudging acceptance of “life goes on” and forcing himself to get back out there on “Curtains”. Even during that press run, whenever something would get to him and he’d find himself start breaking down on stage or struggling to keep it together, he’d feel embarrassed over letting people see him this raw and emotional. I realize the documentary is part of this promo cycle that I’m claiming Ed was forced to go through, but there are also a lot of things within it that expose how indifferent Ed Sheeran is to being seen as “a pop star”. Outright resentment at the idea that he’s some #1 hit writing machine who just writes lazy pop songs. Hell, he initially pushed against making “Shape Of You” the lead single cuz he felt like that was a throwaway track he only made for pop radio. That’s what pisses me off so much about Fantano’s comment. He treats Ed Sheeran exactly like this and writes off the idea that any of it could have real substance or deeper meaning. Even though I just gave you multiple paragraphs highlighting how untrue it is if you just do the basic research and maybe a little more. It’s not fair to treat artists like this, no matter how successful they are. You’re not punching up, you’re just demeaning an artist of their work and coming up with an excuse as to why you shouldn’t face pushback over it.
So I guess now is where we talk about the elephant in the room. Or, the fuzzy blue monster in the room.
I didn’t mention “Eyes Closed” when I went through the tracklist because I wanted to give that song special attention. The unfortunate thing about making a personal passion project under a major label is that the label wants hits. Mostly so they can earn all the royalties and the artist is stuck with diddly squat thus having to rely on touring to feed their families. But obviously, hits are important to the artists too, they’re songs they have to learn to love so they can perform those hits at said tours and build an audience that loves what they do. But making a song specifically to feed into the pop music-making machine for this album feels inappropriate, right? Dark music can thrive in a pop landscape, but not a lot of it gets pop radio traction, which is what Asylum-Atlantic want. I mentioned earlier that there are two songs on the album that were written before the reset, one of them being “The Hills of Aberfeldy”. Well, surprise! “Eyes Closed” is the other one. It was actually written as far back as 2018 during the Divide tour, initially about moving on from a breakup, with Max Martin and Fred again.. working on production. Ed brought it back for this album but rewrote the lyrics to instead be about grieving Jamal. Which… I hate to say it, but it explains a lot. When “Eyes Closed” dropped, I felt something about it was off. It’s good, but much more surface-level and basic than I was expecting. The song was trying to pop out as this big catchy chorus, but Aaron Dessner’s quiet plucking wasn’t letting it. The biggest eye sore of the song is filling in the chorus with this “ay ya ya ya” chant in between the title drops, which screamed of “tests well on pop radio” to me (it’s also a common trick used on Divide which makes its age even more apparent). But even as a pop radio song, it still feels very weird and lacking in real pizazz. I do like the song, but I also can’t bring myself to defend it that much. Max Martin and Fred again.. are glaring outliers among the rest of Aaron Dessner’s production. The songwriting is clearly built to be pop and not so much around its storytelling. There’s some potent imagery in the idea of dancing with your eyes closed to imagine someone still here, but especially after hearing the more detailed and intimate lyrics on Subtract, I know Ed could have definitely done better. Really, it was knowing this song was from the Divide era that put the nail in the coffin. I’ve always been forgiving of that era, but it has a specific sound that was built to dominate the airwaves in 2017, and “Eyes Closed” is clearly going for that.
It makes me sad because I think “Eyes Closed” could have been just as good as the rest of the album, maybe even among Ed Sheeran’s best-ever singles. Again, there’s a lot to like about it on paper! If it was just allowed to be its own thing instead of relying on tried and true pop standards, I think it could have really been something. Get specific about the things Ed sees when his eyes close like the mural of Jamal or that scene of them just rapping along to SBTV grime videos. Make it catchy and give it momentum, but in a similar way to The National’s more momentum-driven songs instead of trying to give it a “widespread appeal”. Even if it doesn’t work, it’s not like the current version is working that much either! Again, no appeal for the streaming crowd, reliant on radio which might drop it after weak reception anyway, and its focus towards an older audience is not going to bring in any new fans and will just leave the song cold. Hell, Equals already had a short singles run as only “Bad Habits” and “Shivers” made it far while “Overpass Graffiti” was left in the dust, and “2Step” was a waste of a single. Pretty much everyone I’ve talked to who likes the album agrees that “Eyes Closed” is completely out of place, and for a while, I was inclined to agree. But then Ed said something in the Zane Lowe interview that made me reevaluate how I was approaching not just the song, but the album as a whole.
In it, he mentions the fact that “Eyes Closed” is in fact “the single”. It’s actually a significant talking point of the interview, especially as Ed expressed not looking for commercial success with this album, yet still has a pop-friendly single with “Eyes Closed” leading the way. He actually defends having “Eyes Closed” on the album at all. Not just for himself, but any artist who has a big single on an otherwise personal album. If someone puts out a single for the pop song, and it’s still on the album, that means they believe in it. Even if it was made for a wider reach, they likely still enjoyed making the song and see it as more than just “the single”. I’m sure that’s not true of every artist, but honestly, I believe him. Especially entering a creative field myself and learning that there’s a lot of compromise to making something you both love but also want to sell to a wider audience. Yet, that compromise doesn’t keep you from still feeling an attachment to that art. Because it’s still your art. You can feel about it however you want, but you wouldn’t put it out there if you weren’t proud of what you made. But it was what he said next that really made me take a step back when writing this review.
“I don’t want people to listen to ‘Eyes Closed’ thinking, ‘This is about [Jamal]’, I want them to listen to it and relate it to their own life”.
I spent this review focused on what was going on in Ed Sheeran’s life and how it relates to Subtract. Obviously, him saying this doesn’t mean it’s not about that, but the idea that he wants his audience to listen to it and connect it to their own life rather than this? I guess it explains why a lot of the subject matter of this song is mostly in subtext. The love songs may be about Cherry and her cancer diagnosis, but he wrote it in a way that you’d only realize if you watched the documentary or followed Ed’s press leading up to the album. Jamal may be referenced a handful of times throughout the album, but the songs are more about the grief Ed Sheeran feels rather than about Jamal himself. Hell, the court case isn’t even brought up at all during this album! The only exception is on “Tougher”, the only song on the album to explicitly reference the events going on in Ed Sheeran’s life, and it’s one of the songs cut from the standard version. That… actually explains a lot about how the album is written. How it’s able to feel so personal, yet leave enough open to apply it to the listener’s life. I just… have to let it.
Okay. I’ll play along.
In the very early morning of March 20th, my Abuela passed away due to complications from Alzheimer’s. She had been starting to lose her memory for a few years now, but I thought we still had a bit more time with her. She could still remember far back into her childhood, as well as the day she and my Abuelo first met, but she only recently reached a point where she’d start needing to be reminded of her children and her grandchildren. You’d think knowing someone’s time is coming would prepare you for when they eventually pass, but it doesn’t. I still cry a bit every time I think about her for too long. You’d think having a song like “Eyes Closed” come out during the weekend of my Abuela’s service would make it resonate with you. I remember listening to it a few times while I was at my Abuela’s home. It was quieter. More tense. Like the world knew something happened. And to be honest… I didn’t feel that connection to it. I still liked the song, but I didn’t have a moment where it really felt like it was speaking to me. I think part of it is because the general subject of “dancing with my eyes closed” didn’t really apply to me and my Abuela. She hadn’t been able to leave her bedroom for most of her last year alive and even then dancing was never really something we connected over. But also I think the song just didn’t quite capture the feelings I was going through at the time.
I felt very… odd after my first night of crying over her death. Abuela meant a lot to me. She loved me with all her heart and cherished every moment I spent with her. I have vivid memories of days I spent in her room or when she’d cook me something in her kitchen. She bought a whole ass pool for her backyard just so I could swim in it. And now I look back at that pool and it’s dirty, full of leaves, and abandoned. This is the first time I’ve felt truly heavy, soul-crushing grief over someone’s death. I’ve had people in my life who have died before, but no one I was as close to as I was with Abuela. Now that I’ve experienced it, everything feels… different.
The same week she died was actually a crazy busy week for me. Later that week I had a day in my grad school where industry professionals would come in and look at our work, discussing what we can do with it and how we can potentially break into certain comic industries should we decide to pitch our ideas in the future. The day after that, I joined a Mario Kart tournament hosted by my school as a way to unwind after that stressful day. That day was also the day I flew out from New England to Mexico, which was a whole ordeal that felt like I extended that Friday into 48 hours of waiting. And I just… had to do all that while still grieving Abuela. Remembering that she’s gone and I’ll never see her again.
Those last two sentiments… Those are pretty much what Ed Sheeran describes on “The End of Youth” and “Life Goes On” respectively. It reminded me of the grief I felt… am still feeling over Abuela and how… weird it is. How am I supposed to move on? Some days I don’t think about her, but does that mean I should be doing it more? Is this really the point where my youth ends and I have to deal with the constant struggle of being an adult? Seeing as how my grandma died around the same time I had to learn how to make my art profitable, it makes sense. The thing about grief is that it’s not usually as simple as being sad or happily dedicating someone’s memory. Sometimes it’s bleak, lost, unable to really settle on a feeling. Which I’d say describes a lot of this album as well. It’s never jarring, but it’s always a bit unsure of whether it wants to be optimistic or give in to the darkness. Even it’s ending which is mostly uplifting and romantic still has traces of uncertainty.
Then again, there are points on this album that don’t always line up for my personal life. Particularly with the love songs, but I also don’t experience the suicidal ideation that Ed does on “Salt Water”. Nor the devastating story on “Sycamore”. As mentioned before, “Eyes Closed” just didn’t work for me when I tried to apply it into my own life. But I don’t think that’s a failure of the album or that Ed Sheeran isn’t right when it comes to how an audience should listen to his story. I still feel moved by these songs and their subject matter, whether they apply to my life or not.
More than any critic or loud Twitter rando, I think the person who deserves to give Ed Sheeran more credit is… Ed Sheeran himself. The truth is, someone’s personal story can still resonate with someone as much as one’s own story. Expressing emotions this complicated and messy into a cohesive appealing package is hard. I think back to a lot of the albums involving grief that I love like Skeleton Tree, angel in realtime, The Sunset Tree, We Will Always Love You, Southern Family, all of these reflect on death in very different ways. Some are broken, some are celebratory, some are spiteful, some hold tight to tradition. I think the beauty of music as an emotional process is that no matter what form it takes, everyone can relate to it, even in pieces. Is this Ed Sheeran’s best album? I don’t think it matters. I just hope this helped him process the things going on in his life so he can take on whatever the future brings him. He made something really special that I think a lot of people are going to connect with, regardless of whatever numbers are arbitrarily assigned to it.
If nothing else, I care about this album. I care about it a lot.