“Feel without judging yourself for the feeling. Whatever it is – disappointment or surprise, sadness or joy, envy or contentment, fear, or relief – sit with it and in it. Then let it go its own way, making room for what will arrive in its wake.”
Maggie Smith
Hi friend,
I had another post planned today. Again.
But the last couple of weeks have been a fog of stuck-ness that I’m just working my way through.
You’ll know that this is not a “you okay hun?” move.
But I also want to write truthfully here in The Conversation rather than gloss over the muddy bits.
My data set (friends also running their own businesses) tells me being stuck is a vibe right now.
That the shiny new year, new me optimism has belly-flopped straight into a February rut.
Being stuck as part of the business process
How many times have you been here before? That familiar cadence of stop-starting?
I can always track these flatline points by the volume of astrology newsletters in my inbox.
The “7-figure entrepreneur in 8 minutes” programmes.
Once, I ordered oracle cards.
As human beings we’re not great at sitting with discomfort or uncertainty.
And seeing them as nudges towards a deeper shift. A glimmer that something else is possible. That being stuck is sometimes the green shoot of change that hasn’t found what direction to grow in - yet.
A field guide for getting unstuck
I’m in the trenches with you today. So these are some gentle steps I’m taking. For now.
1. What’s working now? – Yes, we’re the hardest on ourselves. Also being fixed in a narrative of stuck-ness is not a power move. What are 5 things in your work and marketing that are working? Can you action 1 of those today? A LinkedIn comment or scope out your next newsletter, send a pitch email. We’re hardwired towards progress – however small.
2. You already have the answers – Friend, I know this to be true. We’re so quick to look for answers outside of us. It’s beyond a cliché but 30 minutes journaling and allowing yourself to sit in the questions could be the first line on your map back to you.
3. Mix it up - Take your notebook on a date. Have a change of scene, be around other humans, get some air on your face. Let yourself be with this. Self-trust, baby. A life’s work. I don’t love the saying, “You’ve got this”. But you do.
My friend, and
accountability partner, Lucy Werner suggested more listicles in The Conversation. Here’s some wisdom on coming unstuck I was grateful for:· Dear friend Helen Perry shared 10 Things To Remember When Going Through Tough Times (forbes.com). With the caveat that we measure “tough” on a sliding scale.
· Swap “writer’s block” for “life block” in Joy Sullivan’s A Pep Talk on Writer's Block (substack.com). Apply as needed.
· Again, this is Substack focused. But
’s principles apply across any platform (1) 🤍 🎧 Sending Love: 6 Ways to Get Out of the Substack Rut (writersatwork.net)Where are you on the stuck scale? Let me know in the comments below.
Back next week, boo.
With love,
Antonia xo
I was stuck last autumn and into winter but feel like I'm moving out of it. It's tough, there's a fair amount of acceptance involved, but not acceptance in a passive way. Acceptance that this is a phase, and to lean into it and listen too. Not just the symptoms, how it feels to be stuck but to do a little reflection to see if you can be honest about the why. There isn't always a why, sometimes you are just tired and need to give yourself permission to be but sometimes it's a sign. Was it the Maggie Smith interview with Jane Ratcliffe where she talked about being ok with uncertainty or was it the Katherine May one? I know it was in something I read this week....
I think Kate makes a good point - when I look back on periods when I felt stuck, I often realise (with the benefit of hindsight) that I was subconsciously cooking something new...