What we eat, how we choose to eat it and prepare it, where we eat, and when we eat are not things that happen by accident. Our choices in preparing certain foods or eating them are influenced by class, culture, ethnicity, race, and heritage, gender, sexuality, ability, and age. They happen because we are choosing it (whether it’s in opposition to, or a continuation of our identity markers and family traditions). You may have a glass of orange juice on your days off because that’s what your mom did for you on the weekends when you were in school. You might lean in to intuitive eating because diet culture has harmed you. Maybe you love a cup of decaf coffee after dinner because that’s what your grandma always did. Or perhaps you resist eating salad because it’s always assumed you ought to be eating salad because you’re a woman. There are hundreds of examples of this in each of our own lives.
Once you realize that much of what you eat is tied to your privileges and hardships alike, it’s hard to unsee and un-know it. Diving into each one of the identity markers in relation to what we eat could be an entire thesis in and of itself, and when you narrow the systemic to yourself, all of a sudden your food choices and eating can feel vulnerable. It did for me when I realized how much I think about what I’m eating around friends who have said fatphobic comments, and it impacted me a lot when I realized why I love cinnamon sugar toast so much - a yearning for the sweet, comforting moments from a childhood that had really hard moments. These are things I’m grateful to know and realize, but feel emotionally charged for something we have to do for sustenance.
As a person approaching middle age (mid-30s is middle age for millennials! The life expectancy is 77 in the U.S.), I’m thinking about how I want to be and show up in the world in a more focused and intentional way. I want to be a person that others feel safe around when they are hanging out and when they are eating and I want to foster a meaningful community. For me, that’s one with food and eating at the center. But this is a vulnerable thing to do!
In 2024 I want to dive deeper into community with other people who love food. I want to talk about how to make mustard from scratch, or the pros and cons of poaching vs. searing chicken for chicken noodle soup, or that feeling of nostalgia washing over you when you make it just like your grandma did. These conversations and connections don’t come easily though. They take a little commitment from everyone involved to put themselves out there, try something new, and meet new people. It takes a little time, and it’s hard for me to be patient when I can so easily see a vision of people gathering to share in the vulnerable but joyful space of food and community.
I started small and hosted a Dip Party for a few friends over the weekend. We all brought something we made and chatted about what we brought. We talked cookbooks, great TV and video games, and played some games together. As a person who loves hosting, it gave me such pleasure seeing my friends chuckle together over my dining room table. These moments are ones that are locked into my memory - a core memory if you will.
I hope that I can keep providing a fun, safe place for many many parties in the future where everyone can open up a bit if they want to and can be their full selves while piling hummus on a homemade sourdough cracker.
Brat Dip
This is a recipe my husband invented for the Dip Party I hosted over the weekend - thanks for the permission to share it babe! Mike really killed it with this creation! He based it off of how we make sausage gravy for biscuits and gravy, and it’s one we will definitely make again. It’s chunky, cheesy, and perfect for a chilly winter gathering.
2 tablespoons butter
1-2 brats, casing removed
2 tablespoons flour
1 cup whole milk
1 cup shredded white cheddar cheese
2 tablespoons Dijon mustard
Cayenne, salt and pepper to taste
Melt butter in a saucepan.
Add brats (ground meat from inside the casing) to butter and cook, breaking the meat up as it cooks.
Add flour and coat the meat in the flour. Let cook for 2-3 minutes.
Add milk and cook until the milk is slightly thickened
Add cheese, mustard, and seasonings. Stir until the cheese is melted and smooth.
Dip with pretzels, chips, or bread cubes! You can also optionally add sauerkraut if that is the way you normally eat a brat!
Things I Like
These chairs! They’re eggs!
This honey citron and ginger tea has been putting in work for me this winter.
Connecting with childhood friends.
May your week be gentle and may you eat well. 🌲🥣