I personally don't ever lend out books I expect to get back. I do enjoy gifting people books and have a couple choice volumes I've bought many times for various friends. As one other reader said, it's a nice way to share something important to me while also supporting the author (and keeping a copy for myself!).
I have the same mantra! Never lend anything I would absolutely want back. Tamar Adler's An Everlasting Meal and the first volume of Game of Thrones (before it was on TV) are books that I have bought several times for friends (or for myself after I "lend" my copy)
Such a good question! I keep an ongoing list of books I've borrowed or lent (date and to/from whom) because as well as everything else, it's easy to forget. But in the last few years, I've been very conscious how little most writers get in return for devoting a huge amount of time, talent and energy to their books. So when I love a great book and want someone else to read it, I buy it for them. That way, I can give back to the author and pass the love on and hang on to my precious copy.
I personally wouldn’t lend books, or anything else for that matter, if I thought there was a chance of not getting it back. That’s not a lend then is it?
I have, literally, thousands of books all racked up at home and whilst I’m not over precious about the majority, I wouldn’t dream of lending any of my books that are signed by Erskine Caldwell. Once considered to be the most popular author in the world, he is now rather out of favour. It has taken me years to collect them and so I wouldn’t take the risk.
You are not alone. About 10 - 12 years ago many antique booksellers in London hadn’t even heard of him, when I was searching for his books. Yet his best sellers, Tobacco Road and God’s Little Acre, were turned in to popular stage plays and films. He was a very rich man when he died.
There are very few people to whom I would ever lend a book. And even then I apply what a friend used to call the marmalade test. You lend someone a paperback that you are not at all attached to. When they give it back, if any of the pages are turned down, if the spine is badly broken, or there is marmalade on any of the pages, you NEVER lend them another book.
Maybe lending books is like lending $ —don't loan something you may never get back. It takes a while to learn it, but if you'll be heartbroken by the loss, pass.
Having just moved house, in an attempt to downsize (currently sold, but not yet bought), I have donated a lot of my books to charity shops. I don’t think I’ll buy hardback novels again, as it seems a bit of a luxury, and I’m only going to keep the reference books I dip into regularly. I pass on paperback novels to people I think might appreciate them, and when I’m given a book, I try to ask if they want it back or pass it on.
Have to confess I love a hardback! I buy more than I used to. I just love the weight and feel and solidity of them! And when you compare them to other things you can get for the money they're not that expensive
I am evidently more selfish than the rest of you. I don't lend anything to anyone. I have given good (£35rrp) books to people as presents and maybe donated 500+ books to charity. But my books at home are sacrosanct
I have many signed books and would never lend one of them out. I’m more inclined to buy someone a copy of something I’ve loved (Mick Herron’s Slow Horses and Tim Marshall’s Power of Geography being regulars). But I read a lot, so unless I truly love a book and know I will read it again, I tend to give my read books away.
I loved Slow Horses too. So clever how he under bills Lamb and the entire crew—and then they come out swinging. Reading another Herron, The Secret Hours. I too tend to buy someone a book rather than lend.
I still miss a couple of books I lent friends years ago. I've replaced them but in one case I could only find the book in paperback and I miss my hardcover and in the other, I had notes in the margins I'd love to have back. Ah well. No doubt there are books on my shelf from friends that I've forgotten were once loaned to me.
I no longer loan books. I still mourn the loss of a few out of print titles I'll never see again. Now, if I want to, I'll gift a book to a friend in the knowledge that it's leaving my library and entering theirs. And I'll encourage them to do the same.
I had a lightbulb moment when gifting a fabulous dress that no longer fits, to a good friend. I know it will have new adventures. I feel the same about the books I gift.
I try not to lend books as I pick them with care (I rarely chance buying a book I might not love) and so almost always want to hold on to them. Even the ones I haven’t enjoyed feel like they have my time invested into them and are not to be given away. My late mother-in-law used to love perusing my book shelves and picking one or two off, which always brought me out in a cold sweat. She was a voracious reader, so able to finish them in the time before she was due to leave most of the time. She would give away her own books the minute she had finished them, so I probably gained far more than I ever lost to her! I gave my beloved old copy of my favourite book to my oldest friend as a wedding gift, knowing him not to be a reader, inscribed with a note as to why the book was so important to me and why the gift, therefore, was so special. I know he’s never ever read that book, nor likely moved it from the book shelf! My replacement copy really isn’t the same and I’ve not been inclined to dip back into it since. Hold onto your books!
I bet he treasures it though and is just waiting for the perfect moment to read it! (You wouldn't take it on holiday for example ...) Glad the rest of your library survived your MIL's depradations!
Oh, and there's a lovely quote at the beginning of Alberto Manguel's short book, 'Packing My Library': 'I believe that to lend a book is an incitement to theft.' Don't be complicit to a crime, I say!
It’s a great question. My two that I would never lend out are Legends of the Stars by Patrick Moore, a retelling of Greek myths and the constellations associated with them; and Mariners of Space by Erroll Collins, a very obscure space action-adventure published in 1946. I’ve had them both since I was six years old and they expanded my mind enormously. I’m 64 now so they are very old and battered and still read occasionally. I hate lending books anyway because I never get them back, forget that I’ve lent them, and get very frustrated when I can’t find them.
What I really should return: a copy of Petrarch’s sonnets that I borrowed 15 years ago and fell in love with.
I still have some Beatrix Potter books I was given as a very small child. Really the only thing, apart from a few photos I have from that age so to be treasured.
I love that Phillippa Perry book too. I never lend books these days. I do suggest books to others if I think they are good. But at the end of the day, if someone puts their own hard-earned money into a book and buys it themselves, they are more invested in reading said book, and valuing the information in it.
That's probably true but you know how it is when you've just finished a book and are brimming with enthusiasm about it and just want the next person you see to read it!
I have a firm rule of never lending anyone the first book in a series, having ended up with too many incomplete series. Standalones are fine - depending on the person.
I personally don't ever lend out books I expect to get back. I do enjoy gifting people books and have a couple choice volumes I've bought many times for various friends. As one other reader said, it's a nice way to share something important to me while also supporting the author (and keeping a copy for myself!).
Tell us your 'choice volumes'. Always like a good book rec!
Lia’s Seasonal Almanac and Wheel of the Wiccan Year by Gail Duff. Inspiration for celebrating life by the seasons !
I love Lia's almanacs!
I have the same mantra! Never lend anything I would absolutely want back. Tamar Adler's An Everlasting Meal and the first volume of Game of Thrones (before it was on TV) are books that I have bought several times for friends (or for myself after I "lend" my copy)
I have An Everlasting Meal but haven't got round to reading it. Will move it up the book pile!
My favorite book of all times 🤩 it's food poetry
Such a good question! I keep an ongoing list of books I've borrowed or lent (date and to/from whom) because as well as everything else, it's easy to forget. But in the last few years, I've been very conscious how little most writers get in return for devoting a huge amount of time, talent and energy to their books. So when I love a great book and want someone else to read it, I buy it for them. That way, I can give back to the author and pass the love on and hang on to my precious copy.
I think that's probably the best thing to do all round!
I personally wouldn’t lend books, or anything else for that matter, if I thought there was a chance of not getting it back. That’s not a lend then is it?
I have, literally, thousands of books all racked up at home and whilst I’m not over precious about the majority, I wouldn’t dream of lending any of my books that are signed by Erskine Caldwell. Once considered to be the most popular author in the world, he is now rather out of favour. It has taken me years to collect them and so I wouldn’t take the risk.
Never heard of him, I'm ashamed to say! Will now look him up!
You are not alone. About 10 - 12 years ago many antique booksellers in London hadn’t even heard of him, when I was searching for his books. Yet his best sellers, Tobacco Road and God’s Little Acre, were turned in to popular stage plays and films. He was a very rich man when he died.
There are very few people to whom I would ever lend a book. And even then I apply what a friend used to call the marmalade test. You lend someone a paperback that you are not at all attached to. When they give it back, if any of the pages are turned down, if the spine is badly broken, or there is marmalade on any of the pages, you NEVER lend them another book.
I LOVE the idea of the marmalade test! Grease marks too a bit of a no-no!
Maybe lending books is like lending $ —don't loan something you may never get back. It takes a while to learn it, but if you'll be heartbroken by the loss, pass.
It rarely has such major consequences but yes, don't give a book away you'd desperately miss!
Having just moved house, in an attempt to downsize (currently sold, but not yet bought), I have donated a lot of my books to charity shops. I don’t think I’ll buy hardback novels again, as it seems a bit of a luxury, and I’m only going to keep the reference books I dip into regularly. I pass on paperback novels to people I think might appreciate them, and when I’m given a book, I try to ask if they want it back or pass it on.
Have to confess I love a hardback! I buy more than I used to. I just love the weight and feel and solidity of them! And when you compare them to other things you can get for the money they're not that expensive
I am evidently more selfish than the rest of you. I don't lend anything to anyone. I have given good (£35rrp) books to people as presents and maybe donated 500+ books to charity. But my books at home are sacrosanct
Not so much selfish as less impulsive. And your library must be impressive!
I have many signed books and would never lend one of them out. I’m more inclined to buy someone a copy of something I’ve loved (Mick Herron’s Slow Horses and Tim Marshall’s Power of Geography being regulars). But I read a lot, so unless I truly love a book and know I will read it again, I tend to give my read books away.
I loved Slow Horses - haven't read the Power of Geography but often see it in bookshops. Maybe I will now.
I loved Slow Horses too. So clever how he under bills Lamb and the entire crew—and then they come out swinging. Reading another Herron, The Secret Hours. I too tend to buy someone a book rather than lend.
Need to read another book in that series
I still miss a couple of books I lent friends years ago. I've replaced them but in one case I could only find the book in paperback and I miss my hardcover and in the other, I had notes in the margins I'd love to have back. Ah well. No doubt there are books on my shelf from friends that I've forgotten were once loaned to me.
Yes, that IS hard once you've personalised it. You feel a little bit of you is lost
I no longer loan books. I still mourn the loss of a few out of print titles I'll never see again. Now, if I want to, I'll gift a book to a friend in the knowledge that it's leaving my library and entering theirs. And I'll encourage them to do the same.
I increasingly feel, having read all the comments, that's what I should be doing. But old habits die hard!
I had a lightbulb moment when gifting a fabulous dress that no longer fits, to a good friend. I know it will have new adventures. I feel the same about the books I gift.
I try not to lend books as I pick them with care (I rarely chance buying a book I might not love) and so almost always want to hold on to them. Even the ones I haven’t enjoyed feel like they have my time invested into them and are not to be given away. My late mother-in-law used to love perusing my book shelves and picking one or two off, which always brought me out in a cold sweat. She was a voracious reader, so able to finish them in the time before she was due to leave most of the time. She would give away her own books the minute she had finished them, so I probably gained far more than I ever lost to her! I gave my beloved old copy of my favourite book to my oldest friend as a wedding gift, knowing him not to be a reader, inscribed with a note as to why the book was so important to me and why the gift, therefore, was so special. I know he’s never ever read that book, nor likely moved it from the book shelf! My replacement copy really isn’t the same and I’ve not been inclined to dip back into it since. Hold onto your books!
I bet he treasures it though and is just waiting for the perfect moment to read it! (You wouldn't take it on holiday for example ...) Glad the rest of your library survived your MIL's depradations!
Oh, and there's a lovely quote at the beginning of Alberto Manguel's short book, 'Packing My Library': 'I believe that to lend a book is an incitement to theft.' Don't be complicit to a crime, I say!
It's mainly drinks books. And the times comprehensive atlas of the world (£175 rrp)
Agree, you'd definitely want to keep a good atlas
I stopped lending books in college- I never ever got them back. So since, I just buy a used copy for a friend that wants to read them.
If you can get your hands on one that's the perfect solution!
Very true!
It’s a great question. My two that I would never lend out are Legends of the Stars by Patrick Moore, a retelling of Greek myths and the constellations associated with them; and Mariners of Space by Erroll Collins, a very obscure space action-adventure published in 1946. I’ve had them both since I was six years old and they expanded my mind enormously. I’m 64 now so they are very old and battered and still read occasionally. I hate lending books anyway because I never get them back, forget that I’ve lent them, and get very frustrated when I can’t find them.
What I really should return: a copy of Petrarch’s sonnets that I borrowed 15 years ago and fell in love with.
I still have some Beatrix Potter books I was given as a very small child. Really the only thing, apart from a few photos I have from that age so to be treasured.
I love that Phillippa Perry book too. I never lend books these days. I do suggest books to others if I think they are good. But at the end of the day, if someone puts their own hard-earned money into a book and buys it themselves, they are more invested in reading said book, and valuing the information in it.
That's probably true but you know how it is when you've just finished a book and are brimming with enthusiasm about it and just want the next person you see to read it!
I have a firm rule of never lending anyone the first book in a series, having ended up with too many incomplete series. Standalones are fine - depending on the person.
Agree it's frustrating especially when the sequels come out in a different type of cover. And there's something about a loved, battered copy ...