There is your story, and then there is you.
Somewhere, somehow the narrative has become more important than the protagonist. Most people don't care about you, they care about your story. You may be the author of your story, but you're not your story. This is why people congratulate you for your achievements, they don't congratulate you for merely breathing and being decent. Well, except on your birthdays. Then again, most people don't wish you a happy birthday, they only say happy birthday. Perhaps, that's why we schedule excitement galore on the anniversary of our birth. We long to be celebrated, not just our stories.
One of the constants of life is the mind's need to be stimulated---to be entertained. Our vitality is not just tied to our strive for survival but also to be entertained while at it. Thus, most people care about your story because it gives their minds something to chew on. Think of any aspect of your life. Someone you know, at some point, wondered how you go on performing that aspect.
Some people wonder how you're winning. Some are curious to see what your failures would look like. In the same vein, some people are dying to see scenes from your victory lap. Brilliance is admirable, but it isn't attractive. Being brilliant, like every other great quality, is admirable but it's what you achieve with your brilliance that draws the crowd.
A story of you is not who you are. However, you're a handful of your stories. For your stories are the manifestation of your qualities and spirit (or instinct, if you like).
The most likable people are great narrators of their stories.
You know people are beginning to get interested in you more than your story when they start noticing your small gestures. The subtle things that make your every day and monumental storytelling unique.
Your story is similar to others or even shared with others. This is why the most interesting stories are the ones that didn't follow an expected script. When you root for an underdog to win or you wish a billionaire's riches and power would crumble in some fantastic manner, you're not thinking of the individual. You're thinking of the story---how interesting it would be.
I binged Mad Men season three and four during one of my school breaks back home. I remember my brothers found it interesting that I love Mad Men. Growing up, you could count the number of houses with cable TV in my neighborhood in your five fingers. And most houses had only one TV. This meant shared screentime. This meant a limited choice of movies and shows. So we grew up on Bollywood films, Kung Fu flicks, Soap operas, and a few Hollywood blockbusters. My acquired taste for such drama genre of Mad Men was an interesting turn.
Since it is interesting, it makes for good information of a part of my story for them to say "My brother loves films". The part where I gave up my social life for screentime doesn't make it into the narrative. Well, except when the struggle under the surface is equally interesting then it is also included with pleasure.
The most interesting part of us is our story. This is why you gossip about yourself to people. "You won't believe what I did last night." "You wouldn't believe how I got my first million dollars if I tell you." This is why we gossip about everyone. It is why we read memoirs, biographies, tabloids, and news.
To say you love a person is to say you know their story and you understand it. It is to say you see this person within and without the current prevailing context.
It is asking too much to ask to be loved. Ask first that your story be loved. Find people who love your story. Find your clan, with some luck, they'll see you in your story and they decide they love you also. And that they'll be kind and care for you. That they see that the making of a great protagonist also involves scenes of anger and ennui. And that with more luck, they'll stick around for all of it.
With this, I say to you, more caring spectators to your ultimate story called Life, more loveable stories to you, and more shared stories to you and your loved ones.