Turning your uncertainty into opportunity - The Campfire Vol. 47
my experience of turning worry to opportunity
Hey everyone,
Over the last few weeks I’ve been learning a lot about the impact of uncertainty on my mind and body through - wait for it - an “entertainment-based therapy experience” 😂
It’s called Uncertainty Experts, and was created by serial entrepreneur and disruptor Sam Coniff (defo check out his work) and UCL psychologist Katherine Templar-Lewis.
I’ve learnt so much, too much to cover in one article. But I’ll hope to sprinkle some of the great insights across the next couple of weeks.
Gather round 🔥
Finally!
No worry, no black cloud, no weight. Just fun.
I’m playing football with my friends and nothing can affect me. I’m free here.
But then the final whistle blows and a creeping dread starts to gather, like a dark rain cloud forming overhead.
I shake hands, ‘see you next week’ and I’m off home.
The cloud grows darker. The worrying thoughts start to flood in.
It’s November 2021 and I was at risk of redundancy at work. I had no idea what I was going to do next.
Don’t worry, this isn’t a big doom and gloom post! But this describes the creeping anxiety that comes with uncertainty.
Not knowing what’s next. Not knowing where I stood. Not knowing the result of my actions.
Whether it’s worrying about energy bills, the health of loved ones, the cost of your food shop, or starting a new job - we’re surrounded by the unknown.
Uncertainty is everywhere and it’s the invisible thread connecting all our problems.
The final level baddie in the video game 💀
The International Monetary Fund even created a World Uncertainty Index and it’s been increasing significantly since 2012.
According to the science, the body perceives uncertainty as a threat and leads to a biological reaction as a result. We move to a state of high arousal, alertness, and awareness.
Our brain is in hyperdrive, and becomes highly attentive - primed for information gathering and at its optimum state for getting stuff done.
It’s why uncertainty is a great driver of human innovation throughout history.
Even the uncertainty of Covid led us to recognise what matters most to us. As Jamie Ducharme says in Time Magazine during lockdown:
“Who knows what will be open, what we’ll feel safe doing. But with our previous lifestyles already uprooted, it feels easier than ever to plant new ones.”
Uncertainty creates alertness but it can also tip into fear.
Let me share this personal example.
I’ve always found speaking in front of groups difficult. But this year I’ve had a goal of changing my mindset to speaking from dread to excitement. So, for the last 5 months I’ve been going to a local Toastmasters club, a well-known public speaking training organisation.
Every meeting we do something called ‘table topics’ where we have to speak for at least 1 minute about a completely unknown topic with no time to prepare.
For most people, the thought of impromptu speaking in front of people is their absolute worst nightmare. Worse than death, as the saying goes.
What if I don’t know what to say? My mind will just go blank. People will think I’m an idiot.
It’s just fear of the unknown. The uncertainty.
The first time I did it my heart was racing, my face felt hot and my palms sweating.
But over the months of practice, I’ve now got up to speak about a random topic about 15 times.
15 times I’ve felt the uncertainty.
15 times I’ve felt blank, worried about what to say.
But it’s also 15 times I’ve felt the fear, tolerated it and headed right into it.
You could say my tolerance for uncertainty has improved….
The science shows that the difference between our responses to uncertainty - anxiety or creativity, breakdown or breakthrough - is all in our subconscious minds.
It’s all down to your uncertainty tolerance.
And it can be trained.
Your tolerance to uncertainty will decide whether an uncertain situation turns into anxiety or opportunity.
But the good news is we can reprogram this response. Because uncertainty tolerance is a state of being, not a behavioural trait.
And the first step is emotional regulation.
Look inwards
Emotional regulation starts by recognising when emotions show up in our body. It’s a sense called interoception and it’s the awareness of the physical sensations in the body that are caused by thoughts and emotions, like fear.
It begins by being able to describe what fear feels like. Because evidence shows that controlling fear starts with recognising fear, and that begins by describing fear.
So, when you feel fear what does it feel like in your body?
When I first started doing the impromptu speaking I felt a tightness in my chest, uncomfortable and clammy.
That’s my nervous system, drawing blood away from low-level activity like digestion and pushing it to the muscles I might need to protect me.
With practice over the last few months, and armed with this insight about the science of uncertainty tolerance, I learned to tap into that sense of interospection and welcome those sensations.
The chemical effects of fear aren’t always helpful or well timed (!), so we need to hack it.
And that’s where interoception comes in; the better we recognise internal sensations, the better we become at regulating them.
But your brain is so clever, it’ll try anything to avoid discomfort…
Safety first
Reaching for a snack. Doom scrolling. Buried in your inbox.
And this is all before 9am.
These are what you might call Safety behaviours, a concept from the field of CBT.
When we experience uncertainty and feel that fear, we default to these sorts of actions. They give us relief in the short term and don’t help us. We are simply hiding or distracting from emotional discomfort. And when the discomfort is uncertainty, we want to approach it, not avoid it.
Safety behaviors are habits. Like any habit, once you spot it you can change it.
What do you think yours are?
According to the survey done at UCL, the top 5 safety behaviours were:
Alcohol
Sugar and snacks
Procrastination (including social media and doom scrolling)
TV
Busy-ness (looking at emails, meetings and other busy tasks).
Safety behaviours are also extremely sneaky and pretty much unconscious for most people.
I would say my sneakiest safety behaviour is withdrawal. I find short term relief from uncertainty by withdrawing from it, from people, closing off and keeping things inside my head. Which tends to lead me to more and more stress.
And I’m not alone; from the UCL data, the top 5 ‘sneakiest’ were:
Isolating (withdrawing)
Helping other people (as a savior or martyr)
Bad habits online (gambling, porn)
Passive aggression
Spending money
Once you’ve recognised your safety behaviours or the habits you use to avoid uncertainty, you can take steps to increase your tolerance.
The next part is down to neuroplasticity, the ability for the brain to reorganise its connections in response to experiences and grow new pathways.
When I speak in front of people now I practice feeling that fear and notice how I’m reacting or if my safety behaviours are appearing. Instead of giving in to that habit of withdrawing, I make a point of staying ‘open’ - however that looks for me.
It could be positive self talk, speaking to someone, opening my body language, asking for help.
My brain is gathering experiences - by tapping into that interospection sense, by adjusting the behaviours that are trying to keep me safe, and actively doing the opposite.
I’ve seen a noticeable change my mindset. I actively look forward to the opportunity to speak, present or talk about anything in front of people.
This did not exist 4 months ago.
The main point is that uncertainty is a place of opportunity and possibility.
When you embrace uncertain situations or experiences, rather than withdraw from them, you can create new pathways.
Simply reminding yourself of that fact will help you thrive on uncertainty, while others will run from it.
Reconnect 💀 > ✨
Two things I’m fascinated about are elite level performance (mostly in sport or creative pursuits) and mindfulness.
How are they connected you might ask?
Well, what if you could strip away the inhibitions, the negative beliefs, the doubts, the mental demons… the shit, to reveal what your mind and body was truly capable of?
Essentially this is the aim of both elite-level performers and the practice of mindfulness. To remove distraction and reveal the ‘potential’ within.
Rugby legend Jonny Wilkinson and renowned philosopher Rupert Spira held an amazing conversation which delves right into this.
It’s brilliant, deep, mind-boggling and might well change the way you view your mind forever.
The art of flow state and staying in the zone - I am… with Jonny Wilkinson
Till next time,
Joseph
P.S. I wasn’t made redundant in the end!