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Kate’s Point Of View
I felt as though I had failed. My connection to our baby was deeply personal, as only one who carries and nurtures can understand. Feeling as though I might not be able to carry our baby to term was devastating, even though everything had been fine overnight.
Jacob was everywhere, rushing around, taking care of me with hot water bottles, cups of tea, and water to hydrate, with small, frequent snacks to sustain me. Primarily, his attention wouldn’t determine our outcome, but his love felt strong, which fed my positivity.
After Doctor Carmichael visited us again, her prognosis was vastly improved because there had been no further bleeding.
“Can I get out of bed?”
“Yes… but you mustn’t do anything physical or attend stressful work-related meetings. This was a warning, Kate, and one you must take seriously.”
“I can’t be wrapped in cotton wool for another six months.”
“A few more days taking things easy won’t harm.”
“No, it won’t.”
“And you should consider how work, life, and motherhood will mesh.”
Jacob took away my phone, and for that, I was glad. I was coming to terms with motherhood and the essential state of mind that meant I must put the life of another before my own. Jacob would do that, too, but it was different for him than me.