Pt 5: A Complex Life of Family, Faith and Unending Love
The Story of Louis J. Corbo (my grandfather)
In part 4, Louis and Vivian struggled to maintain a healthy marriage after his return from the Navy and in a regrettable act of rebellion against the “traps” of married life, Vivian left the family. When she returned a few years later, the couple divorced.
If you missed the previous installments, you can catch up: Part 4, Part 3, Part 2, Part 1
A new era
Within fourteen months of her return, Vivian remarried. Louis, perhaps because of his belief that in the eyes of God, they were still married, or perhaps because he valued his relationship with the children, made no issue with being at various events with her and her new husband. It wasn’t the future Louis had envisioned when they were married in 1942, but it was the future that was his reality.
In 1965, David married and in 1967, Kathleen married. Louis spent his free time at the Moose Lodge. His hobbies included hanging out with his East Side friends playing cards and dancing. He met a lady, Dorothy, whom he dated for many years, and she came to family events along with Vivian and her husband. When he began dating Dorothy he told her that he would never marry again. Their relationship lasted a long time, but eventually she realized that Louis meant what he had said and she moved on. After that, he dated other women, but none that came to family events.
In February of 1967, Louis became a grandfather and for the first and last time in his life he smoked a cigar in celebration. “Never smoke my life except when Todd was born. I smoke cigar. About five draws. I got sick. Never again I would smoke.” Maybe because he had missed the beginning years of his own son’s life, he utterly embraced the role of grandfather. All of his grandchildren recall the magic of “Grandpa Corbo” with his trick of making coins disappear from his hands and reappear behind their ears. He could silence a crying baby by making the sound of a train whistle. He kept his pocket full of one dollar bills to pass to each of the grandchildren every time he saw them. Between February of 1967 and July of 1975, Louis welcomed six grandchildren into his life. From the day they were born until he was well into his 80’s, he would send a birthday card to each one, often with a crisp $5 bill.
Always wanting to be involved, he was a frequent visitor to the homes of David and Kathy, to hold and play with the grandchildren. He’d often take them to Como Zoo in St. Paul to go on a ride and see some of the animals. Daughter Kathy recalls one time her father had come to her house when she was particularly frazzled and upset. He found her crying in the kitchen. Louis, not one for such emotion, asked what was wrong. She said with sobbing drama, “We have no money and no food… how am I supposed to feed the kids?!” Without saying a word, Louis got up and walked out the door, much to Kathy’s shock. About an hour later he returned with two large grocery bags of food to restock the refrigerator.
Louis was still working for the railroad as a carpenter. He used his skills to build toys for the grandchildren (and eventually great-grandchildren.) And he did some small construction/remodel jobs in the homes of his family. Granddaughter Kirsi recalls showing her grandpa a photo from Teen magazine that showed a well-organized closet, with cubbies and a variety of shelving at different heights (well before “California Closet” time!). Louis gathered his tools and spent a week building that closet for her.
He retired from what was then known as the Burlington Northern Pacific Railroad in June 1981. There was a huge party for all of the family and some of his friends, hosted by daughter Kath. It was a happy day. With his new-found free time, Louis did a lot more fishing. He had fished as a child down at Phalen Lake with his father and later with his friends. “Back 30s. Carmen and I would go to Lake Phalen for fishing many times in the summer time. We caught sunfish. We always bring home ten or more fish. My mother would clean the fish and fry them. They sure taste good. Those were one of my happy days - go fishing. When I was fifteen (in 1935) I caught a big sunfish over 1 pound and caught many more under 1 pound. It the best day I ever had. My mother was so proud of me that day. Even to this day I never caught sunfish that big. I caught fish at Lake Phalen year was 1935 I was fourteen years old. Other happy day of my life.” And now he’d have more time to fish again, which he frequently did with David.
For all intents and purposes, as the eldest child with parents who were living in a nursing home, Louis was the patriarch of the entire Corbo clan. With his six younger siblings, some of whom were married and had children themselves, Louis represented the family and thus began the annual tradition of the “Corbo Family Bocce Ball Tournament and Reunion” hosted by David and his wife at their home on several acres in Houlton, Wisconsin.
Louis was in his glory, surrounded by so much family, laughing, playing Bocce Ball, eating good Italian food and having some beers. Even his former wife Vivian and her husband attended. As a highly competitive Bocce Ball player (as well as card player and dance competition participant), playing against Louis was a challenge. More often than not, he won the annual tournament and was crowned “Godfather” and took home trophies. Big smiles when this happened.
When the great-grandchildren started arriving in 1990, the smiles got even bigger. He was so proud of his growing family. Children, grandchildren and now great-grandchildren. He once stood afar and admired his family by saying “not an ugly one in the bunch.” By this time Louis was slowing down a bit, so trips to the zoo with his great-grandchildren didn’t happen, but disappearing coins and train whistles made a comeback, along with crisp $1 bills. Between 1990 and 2014, Louis welcomed fifteen great-grandchildren, and two step great-grandchildren. He attended birthday parties, sent birthday cards and always had a Christmas card with cash.
A whole different type of grandfather appeared — one who would let the great-grand children dress him up with fairy wings, crowns and nail polish, all the while smiling and enjoying the attention. Visits with the grand and great-grandchildren were getting sparser, and mostly limited to holiday gatherings like Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter, where he always brought the pies for dessert.
After dinner at Christmas, Louis always took a quiet seat in the living room with a little glass of amaretto and sat back and watch the chaos of gift opening ensue. Sometimes he would get impatient and open his gifts before it was his turn, only to be promptly playfully scolded. By far his favorite gift seemed to be lottery tickets and homemade cookies.
In the 6th and final part of his story, Louis’ health wanes but his commitment to family does not.
What a beautiful story about the love he had for his children, grandchildren and great grandchildren.
Once again good story !