To those readers who have landed here at “Perfectly on Time” thank you for stopping by. I write here to share my own stories and perhaps touch one or two other like-minded earth-school travellers. But, probably even more to continue what feels like some type of continually, unfolding soul healing journey.
I find myself in one more state of retrospection (which seems to lead to introspection) as another week begins. In part because of reliving old memories with friends and family these past days which of course led to the title for this post.
I WONDER – IF:
There’s a truth in the idea that each of us has come here to live a “story”; and
As we move through that “story” each, and every, new awareness somehow moves us forward to deeper and significant understanding; and
The deeper and significant understanding then leads us to make changes; and
Those changes include replacing old ideas and behaviours with new ideas and behaviours; and
Those new ideas and behaviours somehow shift energetic forces, not only close by but also, universally; and
Those shifts are having an impact on influencing some type of “greater good” for all …
THEN … might our collective stories have fulfilled “Perfectly on Time” moments that allow us to exit with no regrets?
Loss and grief have been a significant part of my own story, as I’ve no doubt have also been part of everyone’s story. Not just with the passing of my Donald James but also with the passing of a long list of family and friends, beginning with my dad, when I was 5 1/2 years old. This is not a ploy for sympathy. Rather it’s part of “in retrospect” or “walking down memory lane” experiences that came forward as a most beautiful visit with my sister-in-law evolved these past four days.
This is a visit we had been trying to “schedule” for a few months. Once settled as to actual dates, that proverbial “social director’s” hat landed on the head of the Crone and an itinerary developed that would put any 60+ year old to shame. Probably suffice to say we’re considerably beyond that age bracket.
The itinerary included shopping, dining, visiting old friends, attending an 80th birthday party, dancing (me & our group) at a senior “chilli corn western theme” party, and gathering with adult children for brunch to catch up on the latest news. Seemed that the universe helped in the conspiracy of “making in-person, face-to-face connections”. WHY? My guess is that in part it was so we could take time to “remember” some of the stories!
When making plans Donald used to say …."honey, you just go ahead and plan your little heart out….just remember not to try planning the results okay?".” And here’s part of the rub. The outdoor 80th birthday party and the “chilli corn” event ended up being on the same day and the weatherman generously gave us a much-needed rain. So, in addition to less-than-ideal weather the Crone now needed to put on her Stirling Moss driving gloves (that nickname was applied in 1978) and
skip around the lower mainland of our area to visit those very special old friends,
drop-off one storyteller at the birthday party,
while the Crone carries on to go dance and engage with that other group of friends,
to have the Crone return to pick-up the first storyteller and,
then both of us come home.
All within about a 12-hour window and covering about 400km (250 miles)
The Chilli Corn event was facilitated by one of our Senior Resource Centers and included our World Dance Group offering up two performances. This group has offered me this most joyous and fun opportunity to once again experience the love of dance that has been somewhat buried. Thank you Sandy for the introduction!!
And, something happened to me as I was dancing Tzadik Katamar and Jerusalema.
For the first time in what felt like a very long time I had this most beautiful sense of JOY. Bubbling up and flowing over into the dances and filling my heart and soul to the very top. And, that was followed by a new and deeper understanding about loss and grief and how although it never entirely disappears it absolutely DOES shift.
Then add in some “Perfectly on Time” moments, minutes and hours captured during the four-day visit:
The gift of quiet time with that sister-in-law to not only reminisce but chat, out loud, about what, if anything, we’re doing to change some old ideas and give a bit of additional thought to this concept of having agreed to come here to live a “story”.
The gift of reconnecting with those most dear old friends we haven’t seen for a few years and relive some of our shared experiences resulting in belly-laughing and agreeing that we think we’ve lived in the very best of times.
The gift of spending time and engaging with those “more closely related in age” friends and looking through a different pair of glasses with a recognition that ALL our “stories” have been intertwined for over 40 years causing me to consider might we be “soul companions”.
The gift of being able to wrap arms around another dear and precious friend who had to make the difficult decision to let her most special little Papillon “Ripley” leave the earth-school.
The gift of gathering with adult stepchildren to share more memories and laughs and while engaging in that little piece of joy clearly seeing their dad (my Donald) present in myriad ways through voice, actions, facial expressions and warped senses of humour.
This most lovely comment from Jeremy the week before – “thank you for continuing to share your experiences Miss Pollinator” filled my heart and made me laugh. Another recognition that as all the years keep tumbling by, each one of us is truly on a journey and, while connections to one another may sometimes feel somewhat sporadic there remains this “knowing” that it’s deep and strong. I’m sure the writer has absolutely no idea how much that comment meant to this recipient.
All of these “Perfectly on Time” moments have reminded me of the “I Am” meditation Suzanne Giesemann has shared at YouTube. At the end of a life review you say “I’m going to take on that life there”. And the guides say, “Don’t worry about that, it will be over in the blink of an eye. Just come back and bring more love than we are giving you to go with.”
And the meditation includes a gap of silence (referred to as this) followed by “This is always here. The story is added to this.”
And here I am ending up with this overwhelming sense of gratitude for the gift of the stories. Yours, mine and ours.
oh my Marilyn, the beauty and the wisdom in your words is beyond exclamation. THANK YOU for gifting your writing to and for "the greater good". XO
Thank you for sharing.