“Loneliness is one of the most universal sources of human suffering today.” - Henri Nouwen, Reaching Out
As mentioned in my previous post - and I’m sure many can relate - lockdown / confinement / social distancing / isolation / etc during the pandemic was emotionally and physically difficult. Especially during my winter in Paris 2021, I struggled with a feeling of intense isolation and I missed my family dearly.
I had a few practices in place - a few of which I expanded upon - and truly relied upon during those dark winter months.
So, briefly, my solutions to isolation in Paris:
Mindful meditation. Essential for creating space in my mind, whether practicing calm or using guided meditations to expand imagination.
Dreaming and day-dreaming. Primarily of places and persons I will interact with in the future. Essential for me to feel hopeful and retain optimism despite our circumstances.
Fasting and prayer. I found that intermittent fasting had served me well during this season in terms of giving me extra mental energy and clarity. So, I played around with some longer fasts on the weekends on occasion, sometimes up to two days of fasting. This, coupled with prayer and meditation had the added benefits of lifting me out of a fog of my routine aloneness. Via these practices, I felt I was truly leaning into my ‘hermitage’, as I sometimes called it, and thinking of it as a religious journey certainly helped me appreciate all the mixed emotions that I was (and we were all collectively) processing.
Moving from loneliness to solitude. Considering this period in time, this season as my hermitage, as a choice to engage in thoughtful reflection in solitude. Taken as a spiritual practice, solitude emphasizes entering into a sacred space.
“[In solitude] There is the freedom to be alone, not in order to be away from people but in order to hear the divine Whisper better.” - Richard Foster, Celebration of Discipline: The Path to Spiritual Growth
“The difficult road is the road of conversion, the conversion from loneliness into solitude. Instead of running away from our loneliness and trying to forget or deny it, we have to protect it and turn it into fruitful solitude . ... Loneliness is painful; solitude is peaceful. Loneliness makes us cling to others in desperation; solitude allows us to respect others in their uniqueness and create community.” - Henri Nouwen, Reaching Out
Enjoying going to work. And enjoying the train ride to work. Teaching English at the two middle schools where I taught, was often the only reason that I had to interact with people. Especially during the height of the lockdown, we had to stay within one kilometer of our domicile, unless we had a special pass for work.
Enjoying small errands and walking around the streets. Befriending the grocer at the shop where I bought my groceries, walking around and admiring the architecture, people watching, and the like.
Journaling and drawing. My friend introduced me to bullet journals at this time and I loved it for the drawing capability. I drew calendars throughout the year which became the inspiration for the Lisa Sophia 2023-24 calendar. I also drew the street that I lived on side-by-side of a map of Cassis showing the Calanques that we hiked.
Lots and lots of podcasts. I tended towards the humorous sort because I like clever media that makes me laugh, such as Armchair Expert, Conan O’Brien Needs a Friend; and then some more artistic and spiritual podcasts from artists that I follow, such as Illusion Pod; and nearly any interview with Ester Perel.
Spring vacation week in Cassis. I was looking forward to this for months! And it was lovely. I travelled with two friends and we LOVED hiking the Calanques. As a seaside girl and lover of natural structures, Cassis quickly became one of my favorite places I have ever visited. So I am certainly returning!
Merci beaucoup
I hope that this post brings you some hope and joy. I’m grateful to have a spot in your inbox. If you feel so called, please share with a perspicacious peer.
“Like all great mysteries, we are all mysteriously called to love no matter the conditions of our lives, the degree of our depravity or despair. The persistence of this call gives us reason to hope. Without hope, we cannot return to love. Breaking our sense of isolation and opening up the window of opportunity, hope provides us with a reason to go forward. It is a practice of positive thinking. Being positive, living in a permanent state of hopefulness, renews the spirit. Renewing our faith in love's promise, hope is our covenant.” - bell hooks, All About Love
sincerely,