June Letter: On the Summer Solstice, being single+exploring spaces+voids
+the links to 5 bonus podcast episodes
Bomber in bloom
This letter may have a different flavour and feel to it, as I share a number of thoughts and subjects rather than exploring one topic. The reason for this is because I was trying to force out and fill out one particular subject, but it basically felt…forced. So I am sharing a couple that have been coming up lately.
I find this song so empowering:
Holding the contrasting feelings of being a newly-single, childless woman in her mid-thirties
I’m sharing more in a podcast episode tomorrow, but here are some of the contrasts:
I love being able to do what I want and not worry about someone else, and I miss having someone to do things with and worry about too.
I am so ready to date and I can’t think of anything worse.
I love the independence and freedom that I am feeling being single, and I miss being in a relationship too.
I hate it when people pity and worry about the single, childless woman in her mid-30s, as though she’s waiting to find somebody and won’t be happy until she does. I am so happy single. And I pity and worry about myself too.
I feel total bliss when I take myself on a solo date; to a cafe, the cinema, or on a fell walk, and I see couples out together and long for that too.
I completely trust that if I am meant to have children I will, and I feel like I am running out of time as my biological clock ticks away, and I might not meet someone.
Hold space for all the black and white and grey and colour in your life xx
A well-explained and thought-provoking episode on the human needs by my lovely friend, bringing lots of insights and self-reflection:
Paid subscription ends…but 5 bonus episodes are released
Firstly, if you missed the announcement, I am closing the paid Substack subscription :( I released 2 extra podcast episodes per month on there, and also a 6-part series on finding peace with food, fitness and yourself (If you’d like to listen to that do reach out as you can for a pay-what-you-can donation), but I just do not have the time and energy to keep this up unfortunately. And that is something I need to honour not only for myself, but to show up in integrity throughout all of my content sharings.
I have however unlocked 5 of the paid episodes for Substack subscribers only, which you can find easily in the notes section of Substack, and the links are below to each episode:
*UNLOCKED* How can we find time to care for ourselves when we're so busy? (How and why we need to fit in self-care, and what stops us in the first place)
*UNLOCKED*Honouring the seasonal cycles when calling in change (Being a cyclical being and embracing your own seasons of change)
*UNLOCKED* Do we ever really lose anything? (Exploring the idea of everything as energy, and that maybe we don’t lose things; they just transform into something else)
*UNLOCKED* Inner wild healing meditation (A meditative journey with your inner wild by connecting to the elements)
*UNLOCKED* Peace of Body series: SELF (Exploring how healing our relationship with ourselves and our worth is needed to heal our relationship with food, fitness and our body)
(Scales Tarn, Blencathra):
The space between thoughts
What happens between our thoughts? Have you ever thought, or not thought, about that? What is actually…there? Anything?
I’ve been exploring this throughout my daily life, after listening to a meditation by Jess Wood on the Feel Better App, where she takes us through a meditation focusing on the gaps between thoughts. And you know when something just clicks? Well this did.
It felt refreshing to focus more on that space, rather than focusing on noticing thoughts come into that space and letting them go, if that makes sense. If felt less active, less doing, and less negative even. As someone who has meditated pretty much every day for 7 years, it has opened me up to the joy, contentment and peace that is there, between thoughts. And it is incredibly simple.
Mind you, it isn’t always easy, but when it clicks it feels profound, to sit in that place where there is nothing…or perhaps everything?
Maybe all that truly is, is there beneath our thoughts. That may sound like a scary concept to some, but I actually find it so comforting to know that really, when we get lost in our minds, we have a map to return to peace that is the present moment. Right here, right now.
And then it got me thinking about the space between in other areas of our life, particularly the space between something ending and something beginning. Be this as simple as the moment of sleep ending and a new day beginning, to the more complex space between the ending of a relationship or job, and a new one beginning.
I'veheard it described as the fertile void, but I'm not quite sure what I think of that yet.
As humans, we don’t really like space. We try to fill it, or try to move into the new beginning as quickly as possible, as though that space, that presence, that all-there-really-is beneath the thoughts, is undesirable or not the destination. Just think about how often you allow yourself to be in the space between without trying to fill it by scrolling your phone, messaging someone, reading something, planning the next thing, thinking about the past or just thinking in general.
So can we just take some time to be in the moment, in the in-between, and see what is there for us? Gently holding ourselves there, and feeling into what is present.
I would also recommend part 1, but this is also great as a stand-alone and explores fear through the mindfulness practice of RAIN (recognise, accept, investigate and nurture):
Summer Solstice Vibes
Is anyone else really feeling the energy building at the moment, as we reach the Summer Solstice, Midsummer on the 21st June? Take a little moment of pause and just ask yourself how you’re feeling at the moment.
Tired? Energised? Buzzy? Overwhelmed? Joyful? Ungrounded? Loving? Intense? Maybe all these feelings?
That’s how I would describe myself right now. As this energy builds and we move towards the peak of light in the Northern Hemisphere, pretty much halfway through our calendar year, it can create a overflow of certain energies, feelings and emotions.
I feel like I have so much energy and love that it is overflowing and hard to contain. But then I am exhausted because I have so much energy and my brain is wired, and I’m not sleeping well. And it is SO LIGHT.
Our ancestors would celebrate the longest day of light in many different ways, and here are some ideas for you:
Reflecting upon and celebrating achievements from the past 6 months
Journaling on what you want the second half of the year to look like
Going to a sacred site, especially stone circles. Maybe there is a gathering at a site near you?
Being outdoors as much as possible
Spending time with people, perhaps around a fire
Dancing 💃🕺
Listening to a light or Summer Solstice meditation
Watching the sun rise and the sun set…if you have the energy!
P.S. Bomber is adorable
Loved this newsletter and the format, and thank you for the shout out, I’m so glad the podcast episode resonated! I’ll be continuing to speak along a similar vain on it and in upcoming offers as well :)
The space between the thoughts is a beautiful concept. It’s one that I find Breathwork allows to open up for me - where I exist beyond thought, reason, judgement, fear and anything else. And the more I practice Breathwork, the more easily I’ve found myself able to drop into that place even without doing a meditation or Breathwork in that moment. For instance, every morning I have my tea in the sun room and I’m able to sit in this place of calm. Sometimes it’s fleeting and other times it can go for awhile. It’s so peaceful.