6 Breastfeeding Tips to Preserve your Mental Health (from a Mom to a Mom)
Improve your chances for breastfeeding success!
I can’t believe I have been breastfeeding my daughter for 7.5 months now. I am reflecting on our journey and can’t stop but to think of how much I underestimated the physical and mental health it takes.
Before I went into this adventure, I didn’t have a plan. I just knew that I wanted to breastfeed as long as possible and would rely on a lactation consultant to guide me. I started reading about breastfeeding once I was in the thick of it already and I have to admit that it’s not easy to find content that is personable and truly reflects the reality. I hope I can provide you with my raw truth so you can be better equipped.
This list is based on my personal experience and yours might not be exactly the same since babies and bodies are different but I can guarantee that after reading this you’ll have more in your toolbox to weather the storm.
Whether you are a first time mom, already have a kiddo or you are a future mama who wants to get informed, these are the tips I’d give anyone who wishes to breastfeed:
Invest into a good pump before baby is born. Breast engorgement is not a joke!
I suggest investing into a good pump (wide speed range and suction strength) in case you experience breast engorgement which is very common in the first days. Given how small babies eat in the early days and the fact that your milk production will not regulate until a couple of weeks in, you’ll most likely have an oversupply. Therefore, it’s important that you have a good pump to help relieve yourself to prevent clogged ducts or even mastitis.
I had breast engorgement for 3 days and clogged ducts for almost a month. My pump was defective and my baby was probably eating 1/3 of what I produced at the time. I had to do a lot of massages, manual pump and hand expression under hot showers. I was so in pain that I almost quit! If I knew about this I’d have purchased a much better pump like a Spectra because it has such a wide range of settings and lets you control cycle and suction speed.
Bad latch can injure your nipples so it’s important for baby to learn how to latch properly
Nursing is not supposed to hurt and if it does, most of the time it is because baby is not latching properly.
Unless your baby has a physiologic issue like a tongue-tie, this is how they recommend performing a good latch. Please follow these steps, even if it requires interrupting your baby while nursing. Don’t inflict yourself pain for no reason.
When my baby didn’t latch properly, I remember not wanting to interrupt her because she’d get really mad. Not only I was in pain at the moment but it’d take me at least 3 days to recover from those bruises.
Frankly, I self inflicted so many times early on that I reached a point where I thought I’d lose my mind and if it wasn’t for my family I don’t know how I’d have made it out. It’s partly why I decided to share with other moms in case someone else out there is doing the same. Don’t be martyr mom!
Be open minded when it comes to supplementing with formula because you never know what could affect your milk supply
The reason why you should consider supplementing formula at some point is to ensure that your baby still gets enough ounces in case your supply decreases.
A lot of women’s milk supply will go through peaks and deeps during the day, and the month (when menstruating for example). This became more obvious to me as I got closer to the 6 months mark. My deeps are 1-8PM and my peaks are in the morning and before going to bed around 10PM. That said, my baby eats about 6oz of milk every feeding (I know because I combo feed her) and I am unable to make that much in the afternoon.
Unfortunately I realized it after going through multiple series of meltdowns when my baby couldn’t eat as much as she wanted to. I was stubborn about the idea of feeding her only my breastmilk. Don’t ask me why because this is a whole other article in itself about mental health.
I tried everything to increase my supply but it didn’t work as expected so I gave formula a shot. It was such a relief to know that no matter what happens my baby will be fed. It wasn’t easy because she didn’t like the first brand we tried but her pediatrician recommended Gerber Good Start which tastes almost the same as breastmilk and it worked like a charm.
I literally cried the first time she accepted formula. I felt free! It allows me to take a break from pumping and nursing so I can rest my nipples. You’ll need that break at one point or another, trust me.
(If you pump regularly) Change pump parts after 3 months and read your pump manual carefully
Most pump manuals will recommend changing parts after 2-3 months. For the price I paid my Elvie pump for, I was in denial and tried to convince myself that those parts should last at least 6 months. Sadly, I was wrong. I hated my Elvie pump for weeks because I thought the suction power decreased. There’s nothing more frustrating than pumping for 15 minutes only to realize at the end that nothing came out.
Long story short, I thought my pump was broken but after changing duckbill valves (which are not even expensive on Amazon) my pump resurrected! Don’t waste energy and time for a couple of bucks. I love my Elvie at the moment!
Don’t let your baby fall asleep at your breast
Babies are biologically programmed to fall asleep at our breasts so this is not going to be an easy task but let me tell you why this is important.
Think of nap time as break time so if they don’t sleep you don’t rest. If you allow them to fall asleep at your breast, it’ll be very difficult to put them down when they are not nursing. This was the most difficult phase I went through with my daughter.
One might say it’s cute. Yes at the beginning! but as they grow up it becomes irritating because you won’t be able to accomplish anything during the day.
Internet will tell you to create an environment that prevents baby from falling asleep like opening the blinds, switch sides, use gentle stimulations etc. None of these worked for us. My daughter can sleep through a hurricane!!
This is what ultimately pulled me out of this situation:
I only nurse during her wake time periods. If she is due a feeding and hasn’t napped yet, I’ll pump and give her a bottle instead. That way if she falls asleep while eating I can put her down into her crib right after.
Learn to delegate and catch a break!
Breastfeeding is extremely time consuming at the beginning. It takes some time for babies to get used to it and become efficient at it. It takes about 15 min on average for my daughter to nurse. If you decide to pump right after to increase your supply it’s an additional 10 min. You might also want to burp your baby which can be mission impossible sometimes and that’s another 5 min or more. Imagine having to wash bottles after that for example. Your entire day will be gone and you won’t even be able to catch a break. So DELEGATE as much as possible! If you have someone to help you at home, let that person do it. It’s the least they can do.