In yesterday’s post I told you what methods get you the grades. For those of you who didn’t read it, here is a summary:
The Method Used in Grade 8 and 9 Answers
1. Write about a quote in Source A. Explain what it shows about the writer’s viewpoint. That can be one sentence, or one paragraph, it doesn’t matter which.
2. Do this for as many quotes as you can in half your time. So, if you are using 24 minutes for this question, do this for 12 minutes. If you have only 20 minutes for this question, do this for 10 minutes.
3. Then do the same for Source B, saying how it is similar or different to the viewpoints in Source A.
Problems with this Method
1. Most students are taught methods for all the questions which involve this: paragraphs.
2. Just tell me how many paragraphs to write!
3. This method therefore makes you feel a bit unsafe, as there are no set number of paragraphs.
But, it is a grade 8 and 9 method.
The Mr Salles Method
1. Write about the writers’ viewpoints. These are your explanations.
2. On average, every 26 words you write will give you 1 mark.
3. That’s it.
o For 16 marks you need to write 416 words (on average)
o For 11 marks, grade 7, you need to write 286 words (on average).
I told you it was scary.
This method will get you all the grades!
Okay, today, let’s see that in action. Here’s a sample of the sources, so you can make sense of the student answer when you get to it.
Sample of Source A from my guide: Based on November 2021 Paper 2
Source A
This extract is from Dominic Salles’ autobiography, published in 2023. Here, he writes about the different forms of sweets and sugar based treats children would eat in Ibiza the 1970s.
Each day on the island was an adventure, a dozen children roaming each of its four corners. The summer just stretched out far and wide, and further still.
The Golden Bull kids would meet with the Piccadilly Bar kids and the two would combine and greet the Maruka Bar kids and then they would swallow up the kids from the other beaches, all our territories from Figueretas to Playa Den Bossa, where the hotels stopped.
In season, the sands were scorching. The tiled pavements and pool sides were cooking-hot: blisters would catch you, if your feet weren’t flying. We ran and played on dirt tracks all summer, and all year round our feet were tougher than hide so we could almost tread on sea urchins without pain.
At the movies all of us hoarded salted sun-flower seeds, or Pipas. Pipas were cracked and shells spat out, the Spanish way of creating the noises that the English produce more quietly by unwrapping sweets and chocolate. Pipas were cheaper than chips and all of us could afford a full bag, spitting shells out onto the floor, seat backs and any enemies in the row in front.
Sample of Source A from my guide: Based on November 2021 Paper 2
Source B
This is an extract from a magazine article written in 1870. The writer describes candy being made in the little known European country called Monteblanco.
As they clutch at their candy so greedily, no child asks how the sweet was made. Yet the creation of these treats – or perhaps I mean addictions – of childhood is a subject for analysis.
A great reversal has changed society’s attitudes regarding candy and treats of every kind. Once parents demonised them as “ungodly temptations” and, just like forbidden fruits, children sought them out even more eagerly.
Well, far be it from me to denounce these sugary delights that make children’s mouths drool. Savoured moderately, few things are more beneficial than honey. Being packed with carbohydrates, it both warms and nourishes the body.
In previous generations, candy was uncommon in Monteblanco; there was no manufacturing of candy in huge factories. All the supply of quality candy originated from Italy and France but the great advances in steam-powered machinery have made Monteblanco the world’s prime producer of candy. Sweets are now both cheaper and widely available.
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(Yes, I’ve rewritten the exam paper so that the sources have a similar topic, the same sentence structure, the same level of vocabulary, the same language devices, number of verbs, adjectives, adverbs etc, etc. The experience of using them is exactly like sitting the actual November 2021 paper, but with different words, so that there is no copyright infringement.)
In the guide, you read the answer, and then get my commentary. Because this is the free part of today’s post, I’m giving you the commentary first.
My Comments
Explanations 14 (these are shown in italic bold in the answer)
Methods 12
References 10
Points 14
Average 12
23 words per mark
14 explanations = 14 marks
THERE ARE NO PEEL PARAGRAPHS IN THIS ANSWER!
Shut the front door! Hold the front page! Beat me on the bottom with the Woman's weekly!* NO PEEL PARAGRAPHS ARE NEEDED!
(But, equally, you can make every paragraph a PEEL paragraph if you want. Pick the method which is quickest for you).
*One day you too will have Victoria Wood on Spotify.
What is a PEEL Paragraph?
1. Make a point: P
2. Quote some evidence: E
3. Explain what that tells us about the writer’s viewpoint: E
4. Pick on a word or two in the quote which shows us something else about the writer’s viewpoint (so, analyse the language): L
Many teachers tell you you must do this. (Some call the L ‘link’, as in link back to the Point).
Anyway, as I show from student answers in the guide, this takes wayyyyy too long, as it takes so many words. Students do use this technique to get up to grade 7, but then run out of time.
That said, you are in charge of the way you prepare and learn. Pick any method you like.
Rewrite the answer using your favourite method. How many words does it take you? Can you write this in the time you have during the exam?
Response 8
Both sources focus on overconsumption of sweet treats by children.
The consequence of eating such treats in Source A is described as “If you dared to chew, you knew fillings were being carved out of your molars” and of other treats, “parents fed them to me for breakfast”. This reveals how the children were happy to risk the health of their teeth for the short term pleasures of sugar, and how the writer’s parents went along with this. This excessive consumption of sweet treats did lead to tooth decay.
But the consequences in Source B are far worse. Here young children face death, “one might speculate that many infants were killed by gorging themselves”. This also implies that the children were too young to be informed of the consequences of eating these poisonous sweets, and so they were more likely to die by eating too many.
This is how you structure your answer, one paragraph on Source A. Then another on Source B. And keep repeating this pattern. To read the rest of the answer, become a paid subscriber.
In Source A, every child can have sweet treats, “without fail, we all gorged ourselves on turron”. The children were also able to share their treats regularly, “you could invite a friend to join you and elegantly take turns, dipping only the ends in sauce”. Being able to buy enough treats to share with friends contrasts the joy of this freedom and excess with the inevitable consequence of damaged teeth.
In contrast, the girls in Source B do not feel this sense of freedom, as they work “under the authoritarian gaze of their managers”. This suggests that the girls are being denied childhood pleasures even while they make the sweets.
In Source B the sweets are also portrayed as poisonous and deadly, because the “colours decorating your confectionary were probably poisons containing copper.” This writer has a more responsible view of the dangers of sweet treats, emphasising that they might kill children.
Whereas the writer of Source A believes sweet treats are an everyday feature of childhood happiness, regardless of how this might affect the children’s health*.
*this is two explanations.
14 marks
4 comparisons
323 words
Very exciting for students AND teachers Dominic. Thank you! Really looking forward to the new guides.
Now - where did I put that catalogue on vinyl flooring?