The torrid pace of braced waves. Spines in the cavernous coral. The breaking on the shore. Are you the man to take on the world’s fire When you have yet to overcome its water?
The Stoic
Star Shooting
My father has never let up on hard work his entire life. He hasn’t really been able to. He is accustomed to work in a real pull yourself up by your bootstraps sort of way. I have always set myself on a path of emulation, learning to best become a good man. Isn’t that the usual sentiment, an emotional attachment to the ideas of your father? I am the progeny of his point of view too.
He has always had a pie-in-the-sky mentality. He learned English, coming from Mexico, at the height of Micheal Jordan and the Dallas Cowboys. He had the image of aspirations exacted. Hugo Sanchez in Europe, and a World Cup in Mexico. If I can make it happen I want to take him to a game in 2026 up in Seattle.
He shoots for the stars even though his nose is always to the grindstone. Humble and focused. I learned to imagine that I could do anything through hard work, as in the American Dream realized through sheer effort. But it takes more than obdurate effort, doesn’t it? That is something that I had to learn on my own.
Perhaps he hid it from me, as his father done from him. The path that anyone must walk in their life can only be their own.Pivots and hairline turns come at us all, the sudden drops come too as a sudden shift in the landscape. We fall off track, but we know we are able to come back, most of the time. We are our faults and our comebacks too, if we are allowed redemption.
I remember I90 turning down into Spokane, driving into a valley, and back up a hill. I recognize the houses change too as you flow through the hills. My old Camaro hated them, couldn’t stand the ice. I learned that things passed down aren’t always what you need as needs change; you adjust to new conditions. I learned Stoicism from my dad before knowing its name. The foundations of his beliefs are ambiguous to me. Is it catholic serenity or the lessons that come from a culmination of a hard lived life. He too was in the military, that alone factors into some people developing an attitude of an even-keel that has patience and understanding.
At any point through our lives we have the opportunity where paths are diverged, not exactly forked, they often do put you at the same endpoint. But it is about approach. How you come towards anything proves your virtue. Of his dad didactics the resonating lesson were of control: what is and isn’t afforded to you. Over your own actions is self control. Choosing to act in accordance with your beliefs at every opportunity is discipline. Having it in your heart is self-discipline. Control and indifference in reaction is self-discipline.
“The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.”
-Marcus Aurelius
Landing Amongst the Clouds
Or landing on the moon, her crescent holding me as her child. Her low gravity holds me down as a gentle kiss, a comfort and a reassurance. The pie-in-the-sky ideas lead me to believe in innate talent over hard work, but more so that my innate ability for hard work was genetic, that no matter what I could rap my knuckles against the table and get to work. I had the feeling that I could move heaven and earth in one fell swoop, like Sisyphus at a full sprint.
Pushing a rock up the hill isn’t only his punishment, but the reality each and everyone of us faces in life. Day to day you must get up and execute again living up to virtue, but most importantly, cleaning the coffee maker, making sure you brought your lunch with you to work. The slow work is where big things happen as a tantamount pile of laid bricks
I always felt that I could get to superstardom, and the rest was ceremony, pomp and circumstance. Now I am learning the importance in maintaining virtue. I am looking to be in accordance with whatever nature I am in. Submissions are sent out to literary magazines with, not expectation, but understanding that I have not developed my craft enough or earned enough accolades for publication, just yet.
Making the Difficult Easy
I have learned, at present, I can only sustain a concerted effort for about six to eight weeks. I think sometimes maybe I would have been better off as a vagabond, an odd-job-doer, rambling my way across with a notebook and hotel room pens. But that is me giving into fear and laziness. That is not the life I truly want.
Hard work is admirable for the sake of aim, not the accolades, but for the development of discipline, exacting in better conduct, not prideful tidings. This is where I diverge from most interpretations of this Marcus Aurelius quote. I have seen it with a perspective of furrowing headlong into adversity. It is the feeling that one must build up momentum to blast through. For me, it is the understanding that impediments are natural on the course and should be treated no differently. Adversity is inherent, so give it no more focused treatment than any other part of the journey.
It isn’t ignorance but refusing to lean into it as a means of preferred suffering. To tie it back to the poem, it is the icy waters. Ice baths and cold showers are tools to build up a mentality. They aren’t in themselves discipline or self-discipline. That is an internal choice. The difficult made easy is repetition. Go for a long run and settle into a comfortable pace, do that for an hour with no music. Be honest with yourself. When it feels too difficult, slow down, walk a bit, but don’t stop. When you can’t find your breath turn towards form and notice how things change. Suffering isn’t so bad when it isn’t focused, zoned in on.
The Poetic
Unnatural Language
All poetry is fabrication and alteration. It is generated, unnatural language for effect. It is foreign for purpose. Just as it is with your favorite song, movie quote, it becomes an ear worm that just won’t let go. When writing your own poetry, write the phrases that don’t leave you alone, the ones you keep repeating in your head.
A specific phrase is a good catalyst for more poetry. If it is removed in the editing process then it still served a purpose. Write with feelings first and make edits to improve.
The Late
Dear Reader
I make it my intent to always return to this practice with the goal of improving my writing for an audience. Thank you for the patience. I will do better at ensuring these articles are out on time.