This is one of the beliefs from the foundations of the Aqeedah (creed) of Ahlus Sunnah.
That Imaan is neither a linear graph which is incessantly on a rise, nor is it a flat curve, stagnant, never changing.
Imaan, we are taught, goes up some days and down on others, much like a sine curve oscillating between troughs and crests.
This is the reality of believers, the people of Imaan: going growing between peak peaks and the roughest of troughs.
هُوَ ٱلَّذِیۤ أَنزَلَ ٱلسَّكِینَةَ فِی قُلُوبِ ٱلۡمُؤۡمِنِینَ لِیَزۡدَادُوۤا۟ إِیمَـٰنࣰا مَّعَ إِیمَـٰنِهِمۡۗ وَلِلَّهِ جُنُودُ ٱلسَّمَـٰوَ ٰتِ وَٱلۡأَرۡضِۚ وَكَانَ ٱللَّهُ عَلِیمًا حَكِیمࣰا
He it is Who sent down As-Sakinah (calmness and tranquillity) into the hearts of the believers, that they may grow more in Faith along with their (present) Faith. And to Allah belong the hosts of the heavens and the earth, and Allah is Ever All-Knower, All-Wise.
Surah Al-Fath, Ayah 4
When you started to practice your deen, when you “found Allah” — you were flushed with enthusiasm to do good.
So you prayed with a little more focus. You became more cautious of your aadaab (manners) in your mu’amalaat (social interactions) — your speech, your hearing, even your gaze.
You covered up a little more. You listened to more lectures, attended more halaqaat.
You marinated your heart in the remembrance of Allah and His obedience.
And out of Allah’s mercy, you felt the impact, the steady rise, until you peaked, reaching an (imaan) crest.
You soaked up all of it and your heart became enlivened — who doesn’t love that “imaan high”?
You thought you had made it.
Then you started to let your guard down; you talked a little more recklessly, let your glance wander unrestrained and that is when the descent begins. Often, subtly. We hardly notice that we’re going downhill while buried in distractions.
That was a good time to pump the brakes of self restraint, switch to the gear of Taqwa and save yourself from reaching the steep path of the hill — because when you did, the brakes could hardly halt the decline.
Rock bottom. It’s a rough place, isn’t it?
You struggled to keep up with your Salah, where once we found joy in it. Struggled to recite the Qur’aan, where once you cried to it. Struggled with Dhikr, your gaze, your goals. Crossed the boundaries and returned to old habits.
Shaytaan. Always on the lookout, waiting for your most vulnerable moment to strike. It wasn’t enough that he had led you down this path, he needed more, for you to remain there. So, he found you and whispered,
“it’s not the first time, might as well stay down”
And you almost believed him. You almost fell for his deception, yet again. Because he’s right, isn’t he? It’s not the first time and may very likely not be the last.
and once you reach rock bottom, the only way out is up.
"If you can't compete with the righteous in their good deeds, then compete with the sinners in their repentance."
Ibn Rajab [rahimahullah]
So you accelerated your good and started with Tawbah.
You came to Him desperate, humbled, remorseful, hopeful.
You did good even as your heart felt hardened.
You did good even as your efforts seemed inconsequential.
Because experience has taught you that the initial ascent is just as subtle as the initial descent — with persistence, your heart will come alive again.
Tomorrow, you will celebrate at the transit station of triumph, the path of which is paved by persistent good deeds.
And, you know that this is not where it ends. There will be more troughs in your future, more slippery slopes that will have you tumbling down, obvious rocks that you’ll trip over to fall flat on your face.
You are all too familiar with this path, you’ve treaded it one too many times. The lows are inevitable, how then are you going growing between your crests and troughs?
Fatimah,
On the road to Ihsan
Beautiful Analogy
Jazakallahu khayran Katheeran