Rebel from the Desert
The Killers released Rebel Diamonds this month. 20 years. I remember when they used to play at the Thunderbird Lounge before they got on MTV. To hear Mr. Brightside played on the radio back in 2004 as a Vegas local was a proud moment. If I started Jenny Was a Friend of Mine on Tropicana and Maryland, I could get to Hoover Dam by the time Midnight Show played. I was always a library nerd, but back then I thought I might actually turn into Scarlet Diva or Abernathy from Death Proof. I drove like it was just a matter of time before my metamorphosis.
I’m back to my theme of sliding doors and parallel timelines. This exact weekend twenty years ago I was in Las Vegas with my family and friends. Film school. I withdrew from the Psychology program at UC Davis for Hollywood by way of Las Vegas. We can laugh about that another time, this yarn is about frozen moments in time.
When I got off of work this Friday I realized the date. I immediately called my friend Priscilla to let her know. I was excited to remind her. She was excited to let me know about beef jerky with a lemon flavor she had discovered.
“Dude, do you know what this weekend is?”
“A week before Christmas.”
“Where were you twenty years ago?”
“I can’t recall.”
“Well, this Friday night twenty years ago you were with me in Las Vegas.”
“It can’t be. Wait, no, Gabe is 19 this year, that’s about right.I have felt every day of the past twenty years.”
She wasn’t nostalgic about it like I was and I couldn’t relate to being a teen mom so I asked her what she remembered the most about that weekend. She mentioned the family, the food, the shows, and cruising around the strip.
That’s not what I remember the most about that weekend. I can’t even recall my actual graduation. A sea of caps and gowns, blah blah, then finally we got to eat. What I remember was the Friday night Priscilla and I met up with my film friends. The dorms for UNLV that year are no longer there. They were motel style and opened up to a balcony overlooking a stable with horses. Across the street from the dorms is the Hard Rock Casino.
That night I mistakenly chose a dish with a heavy cream. Mix that with the drinks from the party and a lactose intolerant girl found herself in a position where she needed a restroom in a packed party filled with her classmates.
“Priscilla, we have to drive to the Hard Rock.”
“I’m fucked up, let’s just walk it.”
I wouldn’t be able to make it. I was less than 24 hours away from having a bachelors degree, so I was the responsible party. I deduced that the odds of us dying with her driving a single block was not bad. We made it there and I rushed through the casino of the Hard Rock while praying to a God I only started believing in when I stepped out of that car.
Priscilla doesn’t remember that drive in its entirety, but I do because in an alternate timeline, I wouldn’t have made it in time to that restroom and then she definitely would have remembered it minute for minute.
This week I’ve sent a few “hey” emails on Linkedin. During certain milestones, you have to check in with your former classmates to see if anyone has anything in development or gasp, something that actually sold. I don’t know if you feel more like a loser if someone has actually finished a project or more of one if you’re all still in the same boat. I finished in December and most of them finished in May, which means their nostalgia moment will be in 2024.
I spent the spring semester goofing off on independent films that needed production assistants for free. A small European team was filming an independent film and they needed PA’s with cars to help with getting things out into the desert. I’m lazy and didn’t like productions where I had to carry a lot of stuff, but I did meet with this team. The actor walked in and it was the most beautiful human being I had ever seen.
I was so distracted by his looks that when they asked me where I shopped I thought they liked me for being fashion forward. It turned out they needed a dress for the main actor, but he was too long for department stores. I told them about Lane Bryant. They bought him the smallest size from that store and it was still baggy on him, but the length was right. I didn’t work on the Kill Your Darlings set and I don’t see that actor again until I turn on my TV years later and see him as vampire Eric on True Blood. I kept that story in the vault because you want to mention you’ve actually seen him in person, but the explanation sort of reveals things you really don’t touch on everyday.
Stomachaches. Beautiful actors. Vegas strip. Ending the weekend at a family dinner at my uncle’s house. More than half of the people at that dinner are no longer with us. Time just goes so fast. Aside from the famliy home, more than any other city Las Vegas holds a feeling of home. You think a coffee cup in my hand will get me nostalgic? Every block on the Vegas strip is a different memory. So many timelines happening simultaneously for me in that city.
I’ll end this with the family seated for Gladys Knight earlier in the evening prior to the Hard Rock incident. Gladys belts out a heart-wrenching line about life. Priscilla raises her hand and shouts, “Tell them, Gladys!” Our table was by the stage and she turned in Priscilla’s direction and kept on singing, but her smile had a bit of a laugh. My aunts turned and laughed. My mom turned towards her and laughed. I stood up for my friend. I don’t even remember what bullshit boy either of us was hung up on that particular year, but it was real serious to us. Twenty years later, you understand why kids thinking they understood life was funny.