I changed my profile photo, again
And the name of this blog, and my logo, and several other things. But that's not what this is about
A social media personality and writer named Eli Rallo makes monthly lists of what’s “In” and what’s “Out.” Chili is in. Vodka espresso martinis are out. Window shopping and graphic tees? In, she says. But margaritas and professional photos. Apparently out.
These lists make me uncomfortable. How can someone be so confident about what she likes and dislikes? How can she be so secure in her taste? I change my profile photo at least five times a year, maybe more. For every platform I’m on. Instagram. Spotify. TikTok. I can’t even decide on an accent color for this blog. And now that I actually have a following, the pressure is greater. One misstep can throw my entire brand off.
I know I’m not alone in my hatred for making decisions, especially when it comes to identity. I know, because influencer marketing is a $21 billion industry. Maybe we know what we like, but what we don’t know is what we should like in order to fit the identity we want. That’s where influencers come in, and say, “You can’t decide what you like? Let us tell you.”
As I’ve built a following on TikTok, I’ve had a difficult time with the personal branding demanded of many successful content creators, like Eli Rallo. People want to follow people who appear to have their identity all figured out. Because they want that, too. We all do.
Gen Z’s desire for a sense of identity is evident through how many aesthetics we have, and how they double as labels. If I want to be a “coastal cowgirl,” I’ll follow Paige Lorenze. You could also be a “feral rat girl” or a “clean girl,” a “granola girl” or a “salted granola girl.”
I would guess if you can’t find a box to fall into, one is bound to appear sooner or later. I remember when coastal cowgirl was trending, followed by salted granola (Basically if you don’t surf or ride horses but like folk music and the beach). Last winter, I hopped on the “rockstar’s girlfriend” trend (In other words I really liked this red leather jacket I bought).
I’m indecisive about everything, especially how I want to appear to the world. I look to other creators I like for inspiration, a sense of direction, but they’re all so different. One day, I think I want to be Eli Rallo. The next, I want to be Annabelle Kline. But who is Sarah Alessandrini? Do I want to be her?
Although, even influencers change from time to time, season to season. After all, Eli updates her “In” and “Out” posts every month. With my luck, next month, “Changing your profile picture more times than healthy” will be in.