If you’re new to The Rebel MFA Way, welcome! This is an essay in my “Design Your Rebel MFA Degree” series where I break down what it means to create your own Rebel MFA Degree and why you would want to. Some of these essays, like this one, are part of a new experiment of writing my nonfiction book in real time. Thanks for reading!
I have a recurring dream where I’m standing in a room that resembles a support group. I stand up and tell the others, “Hi, my name’s Jade. I’m a rebel.” And the others shake their head in recognition. We’re all part of the “pain-in-the-ass,” “cycle-breakers,” “questioners,” group. Or in my mother’s words: “Someone who dances to the beat of their own drum.”
What she means to say is that I’m a troublemaker. But for whom?
Certainly, in my youth, it was to my mother. But as I’ve gotten older (and dare I say, wiser) I think that the trouble I caused was because I applied a different logic to life and things we were “supposed” to do.
To me, being a rebel means approaching life with what I call “Rebel Logic.” And yes, this is a direct borrowing and repurposing of the concept Matthew McConaughey talks about in his book, Greenlights. His version is “Outlaw Logic”1 and it stuck in me like a barb. Over and over, I’d come back to the passage when he talks about what outlaw logic is and how it worked in his family and I realized I resonated with it because it was essentially the way I approached my own life. Except, I always referred to this as just being a “rebel.” And then it hit me like a greenlight (pun intended)… The way I’ve lived my life, the choices I’ve made or not made, the best things I’ve ever done for myself have all been through the lens of my rebel logic. These little life adjustments I make because the “standard,” “normal,” “status quo” ways never suited me. I can define rebel logic for myself instantly, as it shows up in my intuition and gut responses. But to explain it to someone else is a lot harder than I thought when I started writing this book. There’s so much nuance and context to consider. So I started with the basics to come up with a compromise to describe my little bits of insight scattered throughout the book labeled as “Rebel Logic.”
The Dictionary2 definition of rebel is:
noun: rebel; plural noun: rebels
/ˈreb(ə)l/
a person who rises in opposition or armed resistance against an established government or ruler.
a person who resists authority, control, or convention.
I think the first definition is a massive oversimplification of the word. But the second one is… better.
It’s also missing a lot of nuances because resistance is subjective and authority, control, and convention can also mean wildly different things. For an example, resisting a parent (an authority figure) can look differently than resisting law enforcement. Resisting your boss’s advances (an authority figure) looks much different than resisting a dictatorship. The concepts of control and convention vary from culture to culture, location to location.
So, those don’t do it for me.
From there, I went back and re-read Greenlights. I loved it just as much the second time around, but I also felt like my definition had shifted from his outlaw logic. Which is good. As he advocates in the book… take something and make it your own. Thanks for the permission, McConaughey.
Rebel Logic: Take something and make it your own.
Here’s what I’ve been able to come up with a compromise:
“Rebel Logic” is:
Daring to live outside the logic that everyone else says is the “right” way. It’s being committed to questioning the status quo not because you're trying to be a troublemaking dick… but because you believe that understanding is knowledge. And knowledge is empowerment. And empowerment means you empower others.
Never has this been more true in my life than when I spoke out about my childhood sexual abuse. But you know what?
Rebel Logic: Telling and owning your truth is never wrong.
I may write another book (possibly a memoir someday) about how I’ve applied this all areas of my life. But for this book, let’s focus on education. You’ll see these little tidbits of “Rebel Logic” scattered throughout these pages, but I will also connect it to how I’ve designed my own Rebel MFA Degree and the processes and methods of doing it for yourself.
Why Write This Book?
All throughout high school and college, when people asked me about my career aspirations in life, my answers varied, but I always added a caveat because I anticipated the inevitable follow-up question, “And no, I am not interested in teaching.”
I didn’t want to be the kind of “teacher” that I experienced for most of my education. The teachers who I loved and felt the most connection with were not just teachers who understood aspects of me and believed in me, but the ones who broke the rules. They were the “rebels” of the education system.
The teachers who swore. The teachers who took a bunch of us out to a movie on the weekend. The teachers we could call at midnight if we were in an emergency. The teachers who cared to listen to what I had to say and respond with genuine concern. I thought they were the exceptions. I could see myself being like them. But only if I broke the rules.
And as I watched friends and even siblings enter the education space, I saw that not only was there not an option of breaking the rules, but sometimes the job wasn’t even worth the pain it caused.
Thank you, next.
So I didn’t ever consider teaching as an option. I would not teach, plain and simple.
What I didn’t know then was that becoming a teacher would be exactly where I’d end up.
What I didn’t know then was that I hadn’t yet experienced enough of my life to comprehend the true meaning of teaching or leading someone.
What I didn’t know then is that I have a gift and a passion for teaching others. More than I ever realized. And in so many ways!
At that time, I was unaware that my true desire was to teach, but not in the traditional ways that I had been exposed to for most of my life.
Here’s the kicker.
I’m a damn good teacher.
This is not narcissism or positive self-talk. It’s not arrogance. It’s because I take the experience and growth that my students experience as evidence. I watch their “a-ha’s” unfold in real time and know that I’m making an impact. It might be a slight one. It might change the course of their lives like a few teachers have done for me. I have unwavering faith in my students’ capacity to learn when provided with a suitable learning environment.
I strongly believe it’s also because of my Rebel Logic that allows my students to take pressure off of what they think they’re expected to do, or be, or achieve.
From a teaching standpoint, I’ve longed to write a book for the Rebel Teachers. I want to write this book for the generous individuals who share their knowledge and wisdom in a manner that empowers others instead of depriving them of their innate brilliance by forcing them to conform to something they are not.
But there’s another side to this equation that we haven’t touched on yet.
And that part stems from my identity of being a writer and a consumer of writing education.
I’ve told the following story many times before. It’s one of my favorite “believe in yourself” anecdotes from my life. But I rarely follow it up with what happened after the story. So I’m going to give it to you straight here, full story and all.
As we’ve established, I like to rebel. And my first big life transgression to myself was choosing to rebel against what I knew to be true in my bones: I was a writer. Not in my first two years of college, I wasn’t. I rebelled against myself and everyone who knew me. I was going to double in Spanish and Russian Translation. I was going to be an interpreter and have fabulous job prospects ahead of me.
Spoiler alert: That’s not what happened.
During my two years at that school, I took every creative “elective” I could, including a creative writing class. I can still remember the instructor. He was one of those academia writers who wrote poetry, wore patched jackets, had glasses and a beard. He was dreamy and also gave a damn about his students.
Towards the end of class, during his office hours, he bluntly told me his thoughts.
“What are you doing here?” He asked. “You don’t belong here. You need to go to a school that can foster and nurture your writing abilities.”
I was completely shocked. Not only had I denied that I wanted this… I had believed that I was not worthy of being a writer. I wasn’t good enough. Not smart enough.
But here was this instructor who was worldly and educated and teaching at a college and he believed in me.
So I did another rebellious thing (at least compared to many of my friends in college). I applied to the school I had really wanted to go to and chased my dreams.
When they accepted me, a part of me felt validated.
This was it, I thought. I was finally going to be accepted for me.
That’s where I usually stop telling the story.
Because what happened next is not at all what I thought would happen when I arrived at this new chapter of my life.
The writing and literature classes that were required for the degree were often what you’d expect out of a white, wealthy, prestigious school. We read the classics (don’t get me wrong; I love some classics), but 90% of the required reading materials were from white, old, men. There were some exceptions, like an African Lit class I took with an amazing instructor who (surprise, surprise) broke most conventional rules about grading. We got graded on two things: active class participation and a final essay discussing the books we read for class. I also wrote an essay about my blind professor, who taught a “beatnik” class and endlessly inspired me.
But mostly, my literature education was not well rounded.
And the writing classes!
They were intolerable at times, droning on and on about the “rules” of writing. Yet whenever I mentioned a book that had broken those rules or conventions, they would either respond with:
“They are the exception.”
“You must know the rules to break them.”
I didn’t agree with that. I still don’t. Because to me, in writing, the rules are merely suggestions or guidelines — not absolutes.
Then, there was the class that scarred me for life. We had a visiting instructor and, thankfully, they wanted to be honest with us. I’m paraphrasing, but the gist of what he said was:
“Those of you sitting here thinking that you’ll get into the MFA program here need to be ready for disappointment. Rarely do they accept an undergrad student from this school into the MFA program. The standards are superior and the likelihood that you are of that caliber is very slim.”
To put it into some context here… I went to the University of Iowa, which has one of the oldest and most prestigious MFA programs in the U.S. (We’ll discuss this in a future chapter more in depth). There’s no denying that it’s a great school and very competitive. But to hear such blunt words was deeply disheartening. And if he had been the only one to relay this information, I may have been just rebellious enough to ignore it. But it wasn’t just him. I talked to other professors who were willing to cut through the bullshit. I spoke with MFA candidates who had been denied acceptance. The statement appeared more truthful than exaggerated.
My disillusionment came full circle, and I realized that if this is what it meant to be a writer, then I didn’t want to be one any longer. At least on the surface.
I wrote novels and personal essays and short stories the entire time. I just did nothing with them.
I graduated with my degree in English Literature and Creative Writing and quickly got a job as a copywriter. The only “real” writing job I could justify.
I was good at it. Really good, actually.
But I hated it. I also hated corporate culture, but that’s a different topic for a different book.
More than anything, though… I hated myself.
Here I was, standing in the aftermath of such a monumental moment in my young adult life — being told that I was a talented writer and I should get that nurtured, only to be disillusioned and resentful of the truth and reality.
It took my fairy-tale of a husband to make a competitive deal with me to get back to that central truth in my life: I was a writer.
But once I let go of all the bullshit that clouded my belief, I started writing again and never stopped.
There would be seasons in my life where I considered applying for MFA programs. Especially as I saw the most successful “writers” had gone to MFA programs. Or at least they had credentials and awards to their name.
I had none of that. And I would often think, “Do I need to?”
And the truth is… no. I didn’t need to. I don’t believe any writer needs to. Are MFA programs great for someone people? Yes, absolutely. I will go into depth in a future chapter on a few of the reasons you should at least consider if an MFA program is right for you.
Rebel Logic: You often don’t need the things people tell you that you need.
This has proved itself to me repeatedly. Writers who don’t have an MFA degree have taught some of the most impactful writing classes I’ve taken over the past decade. They have zero awards to their name, and live a quiet non-academic life.
These are teachers who most often blend life experience, deep passion for the topic, and who are actually doing the work of being a writer and teaching it every day.
I knew that was the kind of teacher I wanted to be and the type of education I wanted to keep pursuing for the rest of my life.
This book is a culmination of what I’ve learned (so far) about taking your education into your own hands and crafting a wildly beautiful, engaging, inspiring experience.
Because you can have that if you’re willing to do the work.
Education Outside the Status Quo
Now that we’ve touched on my motivation for writing this book and the basics of “Rebel Logic,” it’s time to talk about how it applies to this radical approach of designing your own Rebel MFA Degree.
I coined the “Rebel MFA Degree” term back in 2022 when I published a post on Substack called “My Rebel MFA Degree.” This post was an introduction to why I was designing my own Rebel MFA degree and why.
I was craving education in writing and I knew the only way to satisfy it was to take control and actively seek out the education I wanted and needed.
I outlined what I thought this might look like by reading the only book I could find on the subject.
I’d long followed Gabriela Pereira and her D.I.Y. MFA blog. So when she released her book, I was elated. In her book, DIY MFA Write with Focus, Read with Purpose, Build Your Community3, she outlines a formula for DIY’ing your MFA.
Those components are:
Write with Focus
Read with Purpose
Build Your Community
I liked that simplified approach.
But to cover my bases, I also researched how actual MFA programs were positioning the programs.
One of my favorite (and least rigid) ones came from none other than The University of Minnesota, Mankato. Where my husband and I had relocated to.
Here is how they describe their Creative Writing MFA program4:
The Department of English offers the Master of Fine Arts degree in Creative Writing for students committed to pursuing the writing life. This three-year degree provides advanced graduate-level coursework in writing, language, literature, as well as studies in a related field. The third year of the program focuses on the final development of a book-length manuscript suitable for publication, the MFA essay, and the MFA thesis defense.
Between Gabriella’s approach and the basis of actual MFA programs, I felt pretty confident that I could achieve most of it on my own. The MFA thesis defense was the only aspect of the program that I couldn’t see being validated (but I found loopholes I will explain in future chapters).
So with that information in hand, I developed the first iteration of what my Rebel MFA Degree was going to look like.
Rebel DIY MFA “Requirements” [Written in 2022]
Committed to pursuing the writing life [Write with focus]
Not only am I deeply committed to pursuing the writing life — I am living it. This one is a no-brainer for me.
Advanced graduate-level coursework in writing, language, literature, as well as studies in a related field. [Write with focus, Read for purpose, Build community]
I decided to focus my “first semester” of classes on topics like:
Fairytale Heroines Seminar Series [The Carterhaugh School]
Magical Realism & Cultural Context [Catapult — now defunct]
The Psychology of Characters [Catapult]
Becoming Monsters: How to use horror, myth, and monsters to discover new ways to tell stories [Catapult]
The final development of a book-length manuscript suitable for publication [Write with focus]
This is something I could technically cross off my list as I’ve produced 20 books suitable for publication, already. I’m also in the middle of finishing my first nonfiction book, Forged in Fire: Writing Fiction to Heal. But I think the natural byproduct of this Rebel MFA education will be a new book-length manuscript suitable for publication. Either way, I feel confident in this “requirement.”
When I re-read this list now, I think of how strong the bones of these still are. These are all still tenets of my Rebel MFA Degree. They’ve just shifted and expanded as time and experience have allowed me to iterate.
Now, I have an ever-expanding set of ethos rather than requirements that guide my Rebel MFA Degree and how I teach others. I have molded and shaped these to encompass more and more of the “Rebel Logic” I know and love. And each one deserves its own breakdown. But allow me to indulge you in a brief look at the ethos that undergird the Rebel MFA Degree.
Ethos #1: Embracing Unconventionality
The Rebel MFA Degree is a self-directed approach to creative development that encourages individuals to break free from the constraints of traditional education. Rather than adhering to a structured curriculum of “requirements” that requires absolute adherence, those pursuing a Rebel MFA Degree have the freedom to design their own path of study and exploration. This approach allows for a more personalized and authentic experience, unburdened by the limitations often imposed by formal institutions.
Ethos #2: Crafting a Unique Curriculum
One of the key elements of the Rebel MFA Degree is the ability to craft a unique curriculum tailored to individual interests and goals. This involves a thoughtful and intentional selection of workshops, courses, and mentorships that align with one’s artistic vision. Whether individuals attend unconventional classes, collaborate with local creators, or take part in alternative communities, the Rebel MFA Degree motivates them to seek diverse and non-traditional learning experiences.
Ethos #3: Adjusting Perspectives [or adopting a “Rebel Logic” mindset]
The Rebel MFA Degree asks creators to look at non-traditional paths to getting one’s work out in the world, rather than defaulting to conventional and often systems of oppression like literary agents or traditional publishing houses or even independent/self-publishing. Diversifying our experiences with readers is how we change and evolve the industry.
Ethos #4: Critiquing the Establishment
One of the biggest aspects of the Rebel MFA Degree is the commitment to questioning the established systems like traditional MFA programs, the gatekeeping in the publishing industry and the traditional metrics of what makes someone a “serious” writer.
Ethos #5: Approaching Writing Holistically
The Rebel MFA Degree encourages and asserts that there is more to writing than just acclaim, publication, or money. We empower writers to use writing for healing, personal growth, and other intrinsic values. We value process over product!
Ethos #6: Advocating for Creative Freedom
The Rebel MFA Degree stands as a strong advocate for creative freedom. It recognizes that true creative expression often lies beyond the boundaries of societal norms and expectations. We encourage rebels to experiment, take risks, and explore unconventional ideas in their creative pursuits.
Ethos #6: Cultivating a Network of Rebels
Another crucial aspect of the Rebel MFA Degree is the cultivation of a network of like-minded individuals who share a passion for creative rebellion. It’s so important to have a supportive and safe space for writers and creators to come together and talk about how to forge their own paths while also getting guidance and camaraderie outside the traditional structures.
Ethos #7: Flexibility Over Rigidity
The last, but almost most important, element of the Rebel MFA Degree is the acceptance of flexibility. Designing your own Rebel MFA Degree should be inherently flexible — that’s the point! Unlike traditional MFA programs at universities, there is no set criteria or specific classes that you need to enroll in. You have complete control over how you want to design and execute your ideal MFA program — remember, flexibility is key.
Who This Book Is For
Disclaimer: If you are a card-carrying member of the MFA club, this might not be the book for you. But also, it might be. You may learn something new you didn’t through your program. You won’t know unless you read it. And because we never truly master anything, you can still create your own MFA degree, this time tailored to what you need now.
But this book is ultimately for the rebels. The writers who feel that bone-deep truth that they are meant to be writing in this lifetime. Whether that’s for personal reasons, as a job, or as a hobby. The beautiful thing about the Rebel MFA Degree is that it’s not restricted to anyone.
This book is for rebels who hunger for learning yet cannot attain it by traditional means.
This book is for rebels who want to engage with their education at their own pace and on their own time.
This book is for rebels who want to combine life experience and practical application along with their learning.
This book is for rebels who want to approach their learning outside of a “status quo.”
If you feel aligned with any of these statements, then you, my rebel friend, are who this book is for.
So here’s my call to arms:
Are you ready to join the rebellion?
McConaughey, Matthew. Greenlights (p. 25). Crown. Kindle Edition.
“Rebel.” Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary, Merriam-Webster, https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/rebel. Accessed 27 Mar. 2024.
Pereira, Gabriela. DIY MFA: Write with Focus, Read with Purpose, Build Your Community (p. 6). Penguin Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.
https://cla.umn.edu/creative-writing/graduate/mfa