This is a photograph or print of my mother, Shirley Berman, by photographer Edmund Teske. I presume the year is 1955. The picture above is from an ArtCenter show focusing on the artists who were shown at the Ceeje Gallery in Los Angeles from 1961 to 1970. Michael Duncan curates Advance of the Rear Guard, an intriguing exhibition focusing on some of Los Angeles’ best artists of the time. Although not as well-known as the Ferus Gallery, they are equally important. Teske was shown at this gallery, and his image of my mom is part of the show.
It is always odd for me to see my mom’s image in a public exhibition. By this time, even after the great Kohn Gallery show Lyrical Cool, an exhibition of images of my mom by Charles Brittin, my dad Wallace Berman, and Edmund, I would get used to this family's attention. It’s a strange feeling of sadness and being honored at the same time, but the intense loss of my parents is something that stays with me permanently. I can’t shake the feeling of them not taking part in my life, and although I’m very much my own person, I still have ties to my family, and my creative and journalistic writing is pretty much focused on my Dad and Mom. Or, I should say that my identity is very much part of their world.
Edmund always felt he was from another world than my parents, yet he was also very much part of that world. What he had in common with Wallace was that both were strict bohemians, but Teske was openly Gay at a very different time. I had never seen him casually dressed. He always wore a suit and tie but had a long beard and hair, and his manner reminds me a bit of Bela Lugosi’s Dracula. He spoke slowly and carefully, and there was a seductive quality to his speech and manner. As a child, Edmund would pet my head when he saw me, and one was aware that he was the center of his making or world. He's not egotistical, but more that he’s an artist, and he had a vision that he went for with all his might and being. He shared that with Wallace, but Edmund, being older, was very much part of the early 20th-century bohemianism and photographed and documented Frank Lloyd Wright’s architectural works.
Edmund and the artist (and friend) George Herms had something in common where they invited people over to their studio and sell their works either through a secret bid, where everyone puts in $5 or above. The winner gets a signed work of art, and often, they can choose various works by that artist. At least that is my memory of these affairs; keep in mind that this was when I was a child until I became a teenager. I remember gestures rather than incidents, and I was highly impressed or depressed about how someone treated me. A cloud goes by, and the mood can change.
My memory of the Photo-Grab parties is that they were held in a neighborhood, not in the middle of East Hollywood. I just looked at a map to see what the structure looked like, and currently, it houses Thai Health & Information Services. Every location has a past, and knowing I was in that structure, I have no memory of the actual place, which used to be his studio.
There is something shocking about looking at these pictures and remembering their essence, which is still with me. It’s hard for me to comprehend that these people are not here anymore. I have to come to terms with the changes I have experienced in my life and the fact that the Guest Stars of the early TV season are no longer in the present season series. That is my life.
Have you kept in touch with George Herms? I absolutely loved your Tea with Tosh episode with him. Such a wonderful, inspiring artist and person.
Beautiful expression of the sliding panels that make our worlds, thanks Tosh