Happy Veterans Day, without all the brave men and women who sacrificed and served - none of the sports we watch or this nonsense written would be possible. Just want to give thanks and wish you and your family a happy, safe, and peaceful Veterans Day.
Hey look, if I’m going to have to do a new song every week under guidelines that I have self-imposed inside my own head, I’m sure as hell getting Mr. Brightside in my first 10 songs. As a thematic concept for the week, between Drake and Taylor Swift, I could probably do about 100+ songs of theirs, but I think that would get dull and variety is definitely needed. Mr. Brightside is the bar song of my generation. I have no idea if I’m a millennial or Gen Z so I’ll claim both. Call me lame, say it’s overplayed, whatever. If you’ve had a drink or seventeen and this song comes on at a packed bar, it gets a reaction from the crowd every time.
Top 10 Reasons Mr. Brightside is the Bar Song of My Generation
10. Everybody can relate in some way to the song.
Whether you think of this song as a Sad Song Sunday or Off-Peak Saturday, it’s tough to be indifferent about this tune.
9. The Killers are a low-key-high-key elite band.
Nobody wants to talk about how they have some other phenomenal songs that I will eventually also use as a “thematic concept” for Week to Week Notes. “Read My Mind” will be about @YouTheReader when I start becoming predictable. “Smile Like You Mean It” and “All These Things That I’ve Done” deserve mention when I’m in the right mood for them. I’ll use “When You Were Young” and “Quiet Town” if/when I ever “make it” and I get in my feels writing about Pearl River.
8. Everybody knows the words.
7. If you don’t sing it or at least give a head nod/toe tap at the bar you’re an asshole.
6. The intro electric guitar and muffled “I’m coming out of my cage and I’ve been doing just fine” is so distinct.
5. If you don’t like this song or make fun of it, you’re living a lie and should seek help. Seriously, it’s about to be 2023, being an edgy hipster about this song is bland as hell. Grow up.
4. Ladies some insight: every guy you know from ages 25 to 45 at one point in his life has had a night out with friends, ventured away solo to the bar, heard this song being played in the background, looked down, chugged the drink he had in his hand and then said to himself “fook it, I’m buying two more.”
3. This song gets played once a night (as it should). Did you really drink at an establishment if it wasn’t played?
Don’t force it though as a karaoke song. Let it come on naturally at a bar. Those are usually the best nights and you don’t even remember this song was played because it is such a staple.
2. It brings you back to the early 2000s. No phones, everybody just living in the moment.
1. Cause I say so.
Just trust my opinion, I’m the one willing to put it out there. Disagree with my take? Please sound off in the comments section below.
Let’s talk sports….
Irish Rugby
Ireland 19 - South Africa 16
As the son of a die-hard Irish Rugby supporter, I’ll be the first to admit I don’t know the ins and outs of the game of inches where you can’t pass it forward as much as some of @YouTheReaders. However, you don’t have to be a rugby aficionado to spot world-class sports talent. In the first half, South Africa dominated possession and territory but was unable to capitalize on the scoreboard as the teams were knotted up at 6 points apiece heading into half-time.
In the middle of absolute chaos, somehow Josh Van Der Flier (Dutch descent through his paternal grandparents, who moved to Ireland in the 1950s to open a radiator factory. Source: Wikipedia) was able to down this in the corner to give Ireland their opening try and an 11-6 lead.
Next thing you know, just a few minutes later, Mack Hansen (born in Australia but plays for Connacht) scored the Irish 2nd try of the evening. It gave the Irish a 16-6 lead. After a Johnny Sexton tack-on 3, Ireland was eventually able to stave off The Springboks (ranked 3rd in the world prior to the match).
Jamison Gibson-Park (born in New Zealand but plays for Leinster) was a catalyst for the Irish after Conor Murray had to be pulled due to injury. This week the IRFU stated that unfortunately, Murray will be out for the rest of the Autumn Nations Series as he rehabs the groin injury he sustained.
Ireland vs Fiji | Saturday, November 12th. 8 am (ET) kick-off at the Aviva Stadium, Dublin, Ireland
I despise every word that I’m about to type in this section, but as an unbiased aspiring baseball historian here we go…
Houston Astros Win 2022 World Series
Sometimes in sports, you have to tip your hat to the better team and hope your team returns better next year. Good for Dusty Baker. The Astros’ manager had managed 25 seasons in the big leagues and this was his first World Series Championship at the helm. If he wasn’t already a Hall of Fame manager for winning 2,093 regular season games, this fall classic certainly cemented his spot in Cooperstown.
My own mother’s new favorite player (she waited until after the Yankees lost to tell me), Jeremy Peña, won the World Series MVP. Houston’s shortstop went 10-for-25 with 5 runs scored, 2 doubles, 1 homer, and 3 RBIs in the World Series. Not cool @Mom, not cool.
Ryne Stanek had an electric and well-deserved celebratory beverage after pitching to a 0.00 ERA this postseason with 6 strikeouts in 3 innings.
Swings & Misses
1. Let’s play a game. Can you spot the difference between the two screenshots below?
2. Last week’s PR Parents at Play post got zero hate comments. @YouTheReader, I was looking for motivation people - iron sharpens iron.
3. This cryptic, somewhat-odd post didn’t land me a job with one of the titans of the sports industry instantly…
…absolutely shocking, right?
BUT
what if I told you that the #3 sports podcaster in the world viewed it?
Meaning that there is a more than 0% chance that Ryen Russillo actually read this…
@RyenRussillo: While I can’t touch your 2002-level worst year, I’ve had my own peaks and valleys. I didn’t mean to disparage your Life Advice segment, and I have a ton of respect for how you got to where you are…
…that said, you gotta admit it was sorta creative, and hopefully, it caught your eye enough to read this week. @YouTheReader from now when introducing me to someone new, rather than call me “Tom” or “D***”, please now refer to me as “the-guy-who-Ryen-Russillo-viewed-his-Instagram-story.” Thank you.
The sports anti-hero petty with the pen needs to be Mr. Brightside sometimes. @YouTheReader I’m going to have a ton of swings and misses plus times when I’ll fall on my two front teeth (again) - maybe a story for another time, but I’ll keep coming back.
Week 10, ‘22 Picks
Warped Logic Week 10, ‘22
Thursday Night
Atlanta Falcons 15 @ Carolina Panthers 25
A snoozer. If you didn’t watch, you didn’t miss much.
Off to a 1-1 start entering the weekend of Week 10. Have me down for 26-13 Packers over the Titans for Week 11’s Thursday nighter.
Sunday Mornin’ in Munich
The first-ever NFL game will be played on German soil at Allianz Arena, also known as Bayern Munich’s fútbol pitch. This feels like a very obvious statement but games played on foreign grounds always seem to be a bit wonky. Why can’t Geno “they wrote me off but I ain’t write back though” Smith beat Tom Brady in the furthest east longitude NFL game ever played?
Prediction: 24-20 SEA (+2.5 SEA & Under 44.5)
1 PM Slate
Houston Texans @ New York Giants
Andrew Thomas is the only Left Tackle with 0 sacks allowed, 1 or fewer QB hits allowed, and 10 or fewer pressures allowed. This has graded third-year vet as the highest-graded tackle in the NFL by @ProFootballFocus at 90.2. The G-Men off a bye should beat Davis Mills.
Prediction: 23-16 NYG (-6.5 NYG & Under 40)
Minnesota Vikings @ Buffalo Bills
Huh? Denzel Mims’ clutch 4th quarter 3rd down catch in traffic last week against Buffalo. The Jets are on a bye, how did this get in here? Whoops. Did Josh Allen and his silly mustache go on Pardon My Take this week? I’ve stopped listening ever since I now consider them my rivals in sports content.
Prediction: 31-24 BUF (-6.5 BUF & Over 46)
Cleveland Browns @ Miami Dolphins
Tyreek Hill has 1,104 receiving yards this season. That is more than the combined total WR corps of the Cowboys (1,074), Steelers (1,027), Falcons (1,004), Texans (980), Giants (875), Bears (858), Ravens (790), and Titans (658). (Source: CBS Sports)
Prediction: 28-22 MIA (-4 MIA & Over 48.5)
Jacksonville Jaguars @ Kansas City Chiefs
It took Kadarius Toney 1 snap and 3 receiving yards with KC to match the production he had with the Giants from Weeks 1-7. Although he was only in 9 offensive snaps last weekend, it seems the Chiefs will feature him more as he gets more acclimated with Mahomes and the playbook. This week Chiefs head coach Andy Reid said of Toney, “Get him 10 or so reps and get him going a little bit, we will get him more here soon.” If Mecole Hardman is out this week (currently questionable with an abdominal issue), the former New Yorker could be a great buy-low candidate in daily fantasy.
Prediction: 34-21 KC (-9.5 KC & Over 51)
Detroit Lions @ Chicago Bears
Last week against Miami, Justin Fields broke Michael Vick’s NFL record for most rushing yards by a QB in a regular season game with 178. In his last 5 games, Fields has 11 total TDs to 2 INTs with 1,306 total yards (851 passing and 455 rushing). He seems to finally be unlocking his legs when plays break down rather than trying to scramble and pass. If this is the real Justin Fields then not only does Chicago finally have their solution at QB, but the rest of the NFL will have a problem containing the emerging dual-threat playmaker for years to come.
Prediction: 25-18 CHI (-2.5 CHI & Under 48.5)
New Orleans Saints @ Pittsburgh Steelers
TJ Watt was drafted by the Steelers in 2017. From 2017 to 2021 they have ranked #1 every year. In Week 1, they sacked Joe Burrow 7 times but lost TJ Watt in the process to a torn pec. Since Week 2, Pittsburgh has had a league-worst 8 sacks on defense. In his career, Andy Dalton is 3-13 against the Steelers. This paragraph is as boring as this GIF of TJ Watt back at practice.
Prediction: 19-14 PIT (+3 PIT & Under 41.5)
Denver Broncos @ Tennessee Titans
Chris Simms, a guy who faced cornerbacks for a living, ranked the top 5 cover corners as #5 Sauce Gardner, #4 Darius Slay, #3 Trevon Diggs, #2 Xavien Howard, and #1 Patrick Surtain. The Broncos’ succession line at CB1 has been Champ Bailey-Aquib Talib-Chris Harris Jr.- *a one year gap year*-Patrick Surtain dating back to after the 2003 season when they dealt Clinton Portis. Bet none of you have thought about that this week.
Prediction: 19-17 DEN (+3 DEN & Under 39)
4 PM Slate
Dallas Cowboys @ Green Bay Packers
NFL on FOX fans voted Micah Parsons the 2022 Midseason Player of the year. The 23-year-old already established star has 8 sacks so far only trail Matthew Judon (11.5), Justin Houston, Za’Darius Smith, and Nick Bosa (8.5 each). Aaron Rodgers gave praise, calling #11, “one of one in this league.” Parsons can do it all on defense. Has the speed and coverage skills to cover TightEnds, but why would you want him doing that when he can get a sack on any snap?
Prediction: 24-17 DAL (-5 DAL & Under 43)
Arizona Cardinals @ Los Angeles Rams
@FantasyFootballers here is some insight: John Wolford is not a viable streaming option if Stafford is out, even in 2-QB leagues. This may be a bit random but just wanted to sneak this in - mad respect to The Commish of the Rooster Cup and all those who ran the 51st NYC Marathon last Sunday. My first experience seeing it live and I highly recommend it to anyone who’s never been. There is nothing like watching people overcome struggles and challenges while you cheer them on sipping out of an open container. Also want to give a shoutout to @IrregularsNYC on 1st Avenue (Corner of 63rd St.) for providing excellent service and postgame pints. Hopefully, a friend or two of mine will participate next year so we can run it back.
Prediction: 15-10 LAR (-3 LAR & Under 43.5)
Indianapolis Colts @ Las Vegas Raiders
Indianapolis fired head coach Frank Reich and replaced him with Jeff Saturday. Saturday was a legendary Colt center and was actually working for ESPN as a TV analyst up until he was hired Monday. Don’t really like either of these teams but I think the Raiders might be more talented and competent.
Prediction: 17-7 LV (-6.5 LV & Under 42.5)
Prime Time
Sunday Scaries
Los Angeles Chargers @ San Francisco 49ers
Let’s say I know somebody that’s heading to Los Angeles this weekend. If they were looking for some Grub, does any of @YouTheReaders have any recommendations? It doesn’t have to be anything too over-the-top fancy, just something high-quality, you know, just somewhere you’d take a random girl from the bar too if you’re obvi tryna impress.
Prediction: 49-0 LAC (+7 LAC & Over 46)
Moody Monday
Washington Commanders @ Philadelphia Eagles
Since the inception of the NFL, only 29 times has a team started the season 8-0. Philly has never had a team do so before this season. 8 out of those 29 teams won a Super Bowl so history says the Eagles have more than a quarter shot. If the Birds can get some undefeated recognition on Monday night, only the Colts, Packers, Titans, Giants (twice), Bears, Cowboys, and Saints separate them from a perfect regular season. Always a nice storyline to have in your back pocket at the bar.
I know you don’t care about my fantasy league. I know you don’t care about my fantasy team…
…some extra motivation to the lads for the stretch run.
Odell Beckham Jr.'s Free Agency Journey TBD
Many are now calling OBJ the “Hint Lord” for his hints on where he will sign via his Twitter. The rumors of where he will end up continue to swirl as the Cowboys have now emerged as a legitimate candidate after Micah Parsons @’ed him, the latest player on a contender to publicly court him. The Giants have also been hinted at after OBJ was spotted at Newark Airport Sunday morning. @BoxOffice wants him back home. OBJ just turned 30 years old over the weekend and is still a free agent because he tore his ACL last February while playing in the Super Bowl.
YouTube Rabbithole
Kerry Bar Sings “Mr. Brightside” to Lost Friend
At the end of the Week, this is what it’s all about…